Sword Art Offline
by ChazRay
Summary: Have you ever thought what it would feel like to be the only person in the world? Well I never thought of it either, until it had happened to me…
1. Welcome to Sword Art Online, Solo style

_Have you ever thought what it would feel like to be the only person in the world? Well I never thought of it either, until it had happened to me…_

The white light receded from my view leaving the illustrious view of a city. Not a modern day city with skyscrapers but a medieval looking city with the stone houses and cobbled streets. The calming sound of a running fountain filled my ears bringing me peace. Finally I had arrived.

It was as beautiful as Arissa had said it was; the images are crystal clear and I can feel real things such as the wind on my body. It is peculiar how realistic the full dive is; well the name really does say it but I expected there to be some signal that it is a game. However I can't tell in any way that this is a game.

Well except for the pinging sound followed by a 'Welcome to SAO' window that just popped up in front of me. A very clear sign that I'm in a game.

Excited about exploring this new world I head off down the streets which turn out to have Npc stores lined up on either side. I stop at multiple stores asking for their ware prices and see the menus pop up with prices.

I have 0 Col at the moment, Col is the currency of the game, or so Arissa told me. Arissa was a beta tester for SAO and she gave me daily updates on her gaming experience in it. She taught me the basics but did not give in to my pleas for information on hidden secrets. Go find it yourself, that's what it's all about she repeated to me many times.

I had tried for the beta testing too but didn't get into it and I didn't bother to buy the copies of the game being sold when they came out yesterday because honestly I didn't have the money. However I still got in here, what a lucky guy I am.

I prance about the city for a little while longer until I chance upon the main gate of the city. It's a pretty normal arch but the field behind it is a luscious green. Feeling drawn towards it I move towards the gate, the sweet smell of fresh grass wafting towards me. However when I was a few steps away to the other side of the arch, a loud beeping sound came from behind me.

Turning around curiously I discover the sound emanating from a red hexagon in the sky saying 'warning'. The hexagon quickly spread over the sky covering it crimson. A gloop of red squelches out from behind the red hexagons and drops towards the arch behind me.

Revolving round again I see the gloop slowly rise and form itself into a red robe with golden trimmings. The robe holds not body by the looks of it yet it stands as if someone was wearing it.

"Hello and welcome to my world, namely Sword Art Online"

"Ah good, an Npc of Kayaba. Tutorial here I come" Akihiko Kayaba, the creator of Sword Art Online, An absolute genius and he uses his mind for electronics, which puts him highly in my books. This should be fun.

"You are mistaken, I am no Npc. I am Kayaba himself"

That was the moment I recognized I was probably in a lot of trouble "Oh, well how…great. It didn't take you long to catch me then? But how did you get into my server?"

"Your server it may be but it still has a link through the mainframe on which I gaze upon."

"Ah dammit, well I hope you're not angry"

"I am merely surprised that you could install your own server using the data files from the beta version, however those files were a little outdated"

"Yes but it still allows me to play the game"

"Fair point, however I believed that it would be unfair to you if you played a different game to everyone else, so I updated the game for you"

"Huh? When did you do that? Why?"

"Do you not remember the loading took so long? It was then that I had discovered your server and decided to update it to the recent version for you, as to why…well I would have to answer with a question; why did you create a personal server and not play with other people as is common within an MMORPG?"

"Well…It's because I don't get along with others in RPG's. They always take my loot and I never get to do anything when everywhere is crowded with people questing and such"

"And there is the answer to your why. You wanted to play alone so I granted you that wish. I updated the game so that you could play and enjoy it alone."

"You're so kind, thank you"

"Don't call me kind, for I am not. I have granted your wish but I am not kind. No, not in the slightest"

Maybe he is a very humble man but I have an odd feeling that it's something more, something different. "So I'm not getting punished? Y'know, since I did kind of illegally create a server and all"

"I believe that the greatest punishment is the one that they deliver unto themselves."

"So I've already punished myself?"

"You have, and you will realize soon enough, I shall make sure of it"

Ok something is definitely wrong.

"First open up your menu"

I flicked my right hand down as Arissa told me to do and sure enough a menu appeared.

"Ok now look for the log out button at the bottom of the menu"

Scrolling down I don't find the log out button "Um Mr. Kayaba, there doesn't seem to be a log out button, something's wrong with my menu."

"Incorrect, your menu is in perfect order; the log out button does not exist."

"WHAT!?"

"You heard correctly, the log out button does not exist so that the players who log in are not able to log out and neither will someone from the outside be able to log you out without killing you"

"Ok ha-ha very funny, but you're scaring me with the killing bit you just mentioned"

"Well done in noticing that. You may be making a theory on it at the moment however I shall put you at ease; there is no way of revival so if you were to die in the game then you would die in the real world and vice versa."

"Tha-That's insane!"

"Incorrect, I am merely a man who desires to rule over the lives of others in a world of my own creation which is the world of Sword Art Online."

"So does that mean-"

"Yes, it is as you think, the other players within the home server are all trapped just the same as you. However there is the difference that they will not know of this until sunset."

"You're a monster"

"That may be so but am I any more of a monster than the business man who steps on the hands of his colleagues to rise in his career? Or the father who spanks his child when they do something wrong? No, we are all people who aspire to a certain dream, to gain power or fame or help one grow right, no matter the cost to those around us. What may be perceived as cruel by human society might be the walking of one's path to their dream, nothing more nothing less."

"So your dream is to watch thousands of people die in the palm of your hand"

"My dream is to have their lives in my hand however whether they live or die it is their choice and theirs alone. I take no part in whether they will survive the game or die in the game."

"So there is a way out, a way to not be stuck in this game forever?"

"Yes there is one, you have to beat all 100 floor bosses and at that moment all remaining players shall be logged off."

"So…I have to beat the game, they have to beat the game? Forcing someone to play a game just so they could survive, how brutal of you."

"They logged in to play the game so I have done nothing but allowed them an immeasurable amount of time for them to play from beginning to end. You wanted to play so badly you created a personal server through reusing beta files even though you had full knowledge it was illegal"

"You are right there at least; we did all come to play a game, but not a game where death is the consequence of losing!"

"Then don't lose."

"I won't, you can count on it."

"Good, well I have time to spare yet and I have not yet told you all the rules of the game, without them you'd be at a disadvantage"

If I am to survive I'll need everything I can get my hands on. "Tell me what rules do I not know of yet, Kayaba?"

"Firstly you should know that since you are in a personal server the amount of data that can be stored is much more limited than the home server, to show this your world will only be able to support 1 floor at a time."

"Wait what does that mean, do the other floors just disappear or something?"

"Not quite, when you defeat the floor boss and move to the next floor, the floor below you will crumble and disappear permanently"

"So I can never go back to previous floors then."

"Exactly, as you are the only person in this world there is no need for you to have such an expansive world as you will most likely only use the area appropriate for your level."

"Makes sense…I guess. What other rules are there?"

"Just one more, well it's more of a motivator than a rule: When a floor boss is killed your floor that belongs to that boss will crumble and disappear permanently."

"You said that already"

"Yes however you did not notice that I mentioned that whenever a floor boss is killed your floor will disappear, so if the home server kills their floor boss…"

"My floor will disappear?!"

"Correct"

"That's crazy!"

"It is simply a motivator to give you the desire to move quickly and struggle your way through to the boss room and up to the next floors."

"So I have to race against everyone to the boss room and defeat the boss before them?"

"Right on target"

"That's insane! It'll be difficult enough to reach a level high enough to fight a boss but to do it solo, that's truly insane!"

"It may be so but it is what you wished for remember, the wish to play Sword Art Online all by yourself."

"…Seems like I really did bring the worst punishment upon myself. It's basically a death sentence."

"But they are not one and the same are they?"

…No. Because even though it may seem like a death sentence I have still have a chance, however obscure it may be, it is still there. "Is that all the rules?"

"Yes, those are the rules that you must now follow in order to keep your life; kill the boss floor before the home server and do not die."

Taking a deep breath I look at Kayaba with the most determined look I could muster. "Well then, I believe I must be off, for I do not have time for idle chitchat."

"No you do not, however keep in mind that this will be the last conversation you will have with another human being for a while, so enjoy it to the last syllable. Farewell player, this is the end of the tutorial of SAO"

The sky blinked once and returned to its usual state of crystal blue. Kayaba disappeared along with the crimson sky.

"This is quite some punishment you've given yourself Marv"


	2. Chapter 2: The First Day

**Ok so shoutout to Ryol. I mean thanks man for the review (like wow never got a faster review than you). So ctheoncerning the whole Offline thing and the server is online, well semantically you're right. but technically the whole offline is being alone sort of thing (shhhh literary leeway :P) Well anyways Thanks to my first reviewer and Also my lovely readers who stay anonymous.**

**BTW Ryol, you asked for the next one soon. well here you go :D**

* * *

><p><em>I believe that the greatest punishment is the one that they deliver unto themselves…-Akihiko Kayaba<em>

The boar squeals in pain as my sword glides through its flank causing it to burst into thousands of blue polygons.

Stretching my shoulder I take a quick breather. I have to say that having no long term pain is great; if something is in pain it'll go away in a minute or so. After every few kills my shoulders get a bit stiff and ache from swinging a two-handed sword around but with a small rest between kills the pain goes away.

Maybe I shouldn't use the two-handed sword but out of all the weapons I've tried out this one is the most effective at the moment. I flip open my inventory to see my growing list of weapons: two-handed sword, shield, slim sword and spear. I wasn't going to try anything exotic like the scimitars that one of the Npc's were selling because I've figured that I'll be needing to use more than one weapon in the boss fight.

I've killed around 20 boars now and although the durability across the board is still pretty high, overall it's more than enough to break a weapon. Most of the durability was lost through blocking though so I have to block less and dodge if I want to keep my durability up.

Spotting another boar spawn a few meters away I decide to change to my spear, which hasn't been used yet, and charge the boar.

The boars yellow eyes fill with red as I stab it between the eyes and its health bar drops off a portion. Hmm not a bad amount of damage for a non-skill attack. In retaliation the boar rams my spear shattering it and slams into me goring me with a tusk. It pushes me to the floor and tries to drive its tusks further into me. With one hand I try to push the boar back while the other, my right hand, opens the menu. I switch to my shield, which spawns between me and the boar.

Ripping my left arm off of the boar's tusks I place it behind the shield and push with all my might of five Strength. The boar's momentum slows and soon there is little force against me as the boar doesn't have the strength to push my shield. Bashing my shield towards the boar I push it off of me on its flank and I scramble up to my feet.

The boar stands back upright and looks ferociously at me. Opening my menu again I spawn my big sword and de spawn my shield just in time for the boar to come crashing into me. This time it sends me flying across the grass causing me to lose further hp; luckily my sword took the brunt of the blow.

I say that but I can see my bar hitting halfway and changes an ominous yellow. The boar quickly turning towards me charges once more as I stand up. This time I fling myself to the side and watch the boar bound past me.

Standing up as quickly as possible I place my sword above my head and feel the almost invigorating power flow into my hands. The purple pulsating sword stays above my head ready to strike as the boar charges at me squealing in anger.

Slicing through the air leaving a purple trail behind my sword crashes down onto the boars head splitting it and leaving a red and white pixilated line that lingers for only a second before the boar bursts into polygons. My body freezes for a split second at the end of the skill before I regain all movement.

"Whoo, gotta love _Vertical Crush_" Out of all the sword skills that I've been trying out that one is definitely the deadliest.

I sit down on the grass and open up my skill menu which has the two-handed sword skill filling up one of the two slots. The skills themselves are pretty interesting with having them level up to a thousand opening up new things every so often. But as Arissa told me, I only have a limited number of skills, which is a real pain because according to her there are an unlimited number of skills.

Leaving a skill slot open is probably a good choice because although acrobatics looks like a great choice I don't want to find a better one later and not have the space.

Glancing at my hp bar which is resting on the top left of my view, it's bizarre like your wearing some sort of invisible helmet, I see that it's up to full again.

Standing up I spot a boar and head off to it, sword at the ready.

* * *

><p>The boar grazes my sides and I slice down bursting it into polygons. A small pinging sound follows a 'Congratulations you've leveled up' window. Rubbing my hands together in glee I open up the window and see what I gained; an increase in hp, not bad, and three stat points. "Ooh".<p>

What to do what to do. I open up my stats and see my STR,AGI,DEX,VIT all at five and my LUCK at ?. Hmm, strength would always be nice but having a couple of extra hit-points would keep me living longer. I know that tanking is not going to work, because I'm alone. So the only two options I have are to go damage or speed. If I go damage, life'll be easier in killing monsters and whatnot. If I go speed it makes it less likely that I'll die but I'll have to prance about a lot which would be tiring as hell.

Going speed would probably be best against the bosses since getting hit once would probably mean certain death, however if I get strength I increase my monster killing rate thus getting to higher levels before the bosses making it easier and allowing me to spend points on whatever I need. Argh I hate making life changing decisions…Screw it I'll go strength for now, might as well make life in the now easier.

Putting all three points into strength I can feel my power growing. Standing up I take a swing feel the heavy blow cutting through the air. Unable to stop my grin I crack my knuckles and head off to the nearest boar.

My sword smashed down on its head while it was grazing the field and sliced through the boar bursting it into polygons. "Damn"

Well I officially think I made a good decision, now I can crit one shot boars.

Looking into the sky seeing that the sun is a bit past midway point I decided to head back into town. My sword is looking a bit beaten up and so do my clothes. I still find it a bit strange that you don't feel pain, just a small sting whenever you get hurt. A boar got me in a nasty place when I just started and I thought my life was going to end but after about a second it just disappeared. Arissa had explained it but I never imagined how it would feel.

Taking off my torn shirt to see the tears in it and where I should have scars of all kinds I walk back to town swiping at a boar or two on the way.

Going back through the gates the 'You are now in a safety zone' window pops up, nice to know that I can't be killed in a town but there aren't any Pkers anyway, there isn't anyone but me.

Finding my way through the streets I head off towards the weapons merchant that I found a little while ago. After Kayaba talked to me I decided I needed to try out weapons so after slicing a few boars I bought my two-handed and used a skill slot for that one.

Spotting the cheerful Npc weapons merchant I wave. He of course does not respond being an Npc and all he'll only respond to those in a certain distance. Rolling my eyes I move next to him and then greet him once more.

"Oh hello sir and welcome to my shop, may you browse at your leisure" Responds the Npc his layered chin wobbling with excitement. I only bought off this guy because he sounds like Mario, literally the only reason why. I don't know if he's ripping me off but frankly if he's got the Mario voice I'll buy stuff off him anyways.

I browse at the opened shop window and decide to buy a new two-handed steel sword along with repairing my iron one. He jogs off happily to the back room of his shop and brings out the sword for me. After paying him with a decent chunk of my Col I head off back into the fields.

As I walk along the streets on the way back out my stomach rumbles slightly. Woah I'm hungry? Arissa did mention that you had to eat as if it were real life, but you still had to eat in real life.

"…I'm screwed"

My parents had gone for a trip overseas for at least another week and I was home alone. I don't think anyone would come over to my house, so my real body is going to be stuck there without food or water…truly I am screwed.

"Aaaah, why oh why do I have no friends…aha! I still have Arissa who will come over" A ray of hope dazzles onto me but then I remember she is probably stuck in the same situation as I am in the home server….

"I'M SCREWED!"

I can't believe that I'm not going to be killed by a monster; I'm going to die of starvation…why do I have to die in such a lame way?

Y'know maybe I should just end it right here and now, why bother waiting a week to die of starvation or dehydration, or wait for a monster to overcome and kill me. Why wait for the inevitable death that is coming to me.

Kayaba did say that the best punishment is my own and thanks to me being alone in the real world I'm really screwed.

I should just disappear, it's not like anyone will miss me. My parents will come home and be shocked, yes but they will get over it within days. Arissa will be too busy to miss me since she's stuck in the same hell hole as I am. And everyone else, well I don't give a damn about anyone else so I don't care if they miss me or not. Nobody will miss me when I'm gone and I'm going to die anyways so might as well do it here and now.

"Well I will miss you" said a childish voice from somewhere

Pulling myself from my internal suicide and self loathing conversation, I glance around frantically 'Who's that?"

"Over here" said the voice from behind me

I turned a hundred and eighty degrees to see nothing but hear a childish laughter disappear round the corner. Raising my eyebrows cautiously I move towards the sound hand on sword even though it's a safe zone.

Peeking round the corner into an alleyway I hear the childish voice again: "Come on, over here"

This time it was in front of me through the alleyway. Cautiously I walked through the alleyway expecting an ambush or something, at this point I don't know. Surprisingly, well unsurprisingly really, I exit the alleyway no different than when I entered. I seemed to have made it onto a park with trees dotted around the grass, their leaves swaying with the wind. Multiple wooden benches line the walkways of the park and are all empty. All except one.

A young girl dressed in a white dress with long black hair and a fringe cut just above the eyes, sits on a bench facing me and waves at me. Glancing round to see whether this young girl was waving to someone else, the number of times I have waved to someone then noticed they weren't waving at me counts in the hundreds. For some reason I'm always in the way and I always look like a dumb-ass.

But not this time apparently as we are the only people (well I don't know about her) in the vicinity. More curious than suspicious I make my way over to her. She pats the bench next to her and I sit down on the bench.

As soon as I am seated she leans onto my shoulder and then drops her head softly onto my knee. How did it go from thinking about starvation and suicide to a small child resting on my lap on a bench?

"Mmm so warm"

I puff my cheeks like a monkey. I know I'm not good with women but this is a whole new level of what the hell do I do? I mean there's a small girl resting on my lap in a park bench whom I've never seen before in my entire life. She also tells me that I'm warm which I do not know what to say to. Let's not forget the fact that I'm in a game so right now my mind is blank.

"Ummm…..What's your name?" right that should help me understand what's going on a bit more

The child looked up at me with her light blue eyes and smiles "My name is Yui, Daddy"

I click beside my ears…no I hear just fine….Did I sire a child at some point within my life and had no idea about it? Well I'm not the most sexually active person in the world, scratch that. I've never been on a date so well when the hell did this happen? Maybe I have split personality and I went off and did something with my other self, but that doesn't make any sense why she is in the game with me?! Ok, ok calm down there's got to be some kind of reasonable explanation to this…

"Hey Yui, why did you call me Daddy?"

"Because you are, silly" She scoots her head back up to my shoulder and places the rest of her body on my lap. "Daddy you're so warm"

This is probably the one time I am glad I am alone in this world, for if anyone ever saw me like this I can imagine the number of 'He's a pedophile' looks. I mean that's secondary though. The bigger picture is that this strange girl from the middle of nowhere is cuddling up to me and telling me that I'm warm, don't mind that this is in a game or that I'm supposed to be the only person here.

Right I've figured it out. I'm insane. It's the only possible explanation to having some strange child that calls me Daddy and cuddles up to me on a park bench. This must have happened because I was feeling suicidal and was going to have the choice of dying now or starving/dehydrating in a week's time. I must have gone insane from the lack of water. Yes it's all making sense now. I'm just dehydrated, gone insane and it's all a figment of my imagination.

"You're not insane Daddy"

Adorable that she thinks I'm not insane even though she just a figment of my imagina-….how'd she know?

"I can read your thoughts Daddy"

…Yep, 100% sure now. I'm definitely insane.

"Daddy you're not, trust Yui please" she looked at me with the biggest puppy eyes I'd ever seen.

Right so having a strange young girl cuddling up to you on a park bench and calling you Daddy out of the blue, not to mention this is a game and I'm supposed to be the only person in her as well as the fact that she can read my thoughts is totally logical.

"Well yes it is Daddy"

Ah almost forgot she can now listen to my inner conversations. Well there goes my privacy…She does say I'm not insane though so if it is a figment of my imagination it might tell me something useful like why I'm not insane.

"You're not Daddy, because-"

"-Ok wait a second, could you please stop calling me Daddy"

"Why Daddy?"

"Well it's just a bit strange, and I'm not your Daddy anyways"

"But you are, you are my Daddy"

Why is it that when I'm insane the thing that I hallucinate is a small child calling me her Daddy?

"Ok so if in any way possible I am your daddy, when did I have you?"

"Three hours thirty two minutes and fifteen seconds ago Daddy"

…so this child who is resting on me and telling me that I'm warm also calls me her Daddy and has the ability to read my thoughts. Oh and let's not forget that she only three hours thirty two minutes and fifteen old. I am insane in the brain. Its official. I have been driven insane through the lack of water and through being stuck alone. In a mere day I have become absolutely insane. I've only been in this world for three hours and look at me I'm insane!...

"….I'm not insane am I?"

"Nope" she had an ear to ear grin

I just wish I had a wall to bang my head on right now.

"Don't do that, it will hurt"

I almost drove myself insane by thinking I was insane. Wow, a self-fulfilling prophecy. They should really change it to a self-fulfilling doom because there's never a good self-fulfilling prophecy, not in my case anyway.

"So what are you?"

"I am Yui, an AI in the cardinal system to help people who are mentally ill like Daddy"

So I am insane then…

"No no, you're almost insane, that's why I'm here to help"

I'm sitting on a bench with a small girl called Yui who is an AI in the cardinal system and her job is to help insane people become sane again, even though I'm 'almost insane' according to her. Let us not forget that she insists on calling me Daddy and tells me I'm warm and can read my thoughts. Well whatever sanity I may have seems to have flown off somewhere. On the bright side I at least now know why Yui is here and is real, in a way.

"Yui's going to make Daddy happy again"

"Umm..That's great and all Yui but I'm not sad, just suicidal"

"No Daddy you can't be"

"…But I am?"

"You're not allowed to be"

…ok…

"Yui likes Daddy's warmth and wants him to keep her warm"

Really at that moment with Yui lying on my bare chest, hugging me (I don't know where my top went, maybe I never put it back on, maybe I threw it somewhere, I have no idea.) the only thought I had was: why oh God why?

"Why oh God why what Daddy?"

My sanity is within the hands of a small child who is clinging to me and calling me Daddy, it's over I'm just going to go and finish it now rather than later.

I take Yui off of me and place her on the bench before standing up and starting to walk out of town. I feel her little arms cling to my leg trying to hold me in place.

"No Daddy it can't be over, what about your promise with Mommy?"

"Mommy?" well of course, we were missing the mother. Let's see who my wife is eh.

"You promised Mommy you wouldn't lose and dying is losing right"

What is she talking about there was never any woman that I talked to and told her I wouldn't lose….

"KAYABAAAAA!"

"Why are you shouting Mommy's name?"

It's over, it's all over. Not only am I going to starve to death but I have also made a child who is a therapist of sorts and had no idea that I had done so. Also the 'mother' of Yui is Akihiko Kayaba who I am somehow in a marital status with him… I'm going to kill him! He's taken my first marriage away by secretly marrying me and he has taken away the naming of my first daughter! I don't even know what he looks like! My life is over, over I tell you. It's been rotted and ruined to the core!

"Daddy you've gone insane, please stop"

"OH, have I now? Don't worry Yui, Daddy just needs to do a little killing to feel better. Daddy's still a bit shocked that he's gotten married and has a kid as well as having his best friend stuck in a game along with nine thousand nine hundred and ninety nine other people as well as being stuck alone in the same game. All done by the same person of course: Kayaba!

With that I stomped off steel sword out and ready and I jog through the town towards the main gate. I could hear Yui behind me being oddly quiet.

Bursting through the gate I raise my sword high into the sky and activate the _vertical crush_ skill, releasing it and killing a boar without even stopping.

Whipping my head around I see another boar spawn and with a roar I charge towards it and dispatch it in a furious blow.

"Kill"

Another boar spawns and I slice it in half shouting "KILL" into the sky

Multiple boars spawn in locations around me and I dash from one to the next slicing and smashing them into polygons repeating "Kill" over and over again .

After they were brutally destroyed another boar spawned close by and I charged towards it. It aggroed on me and I kicked it in the snout pushing it on its back. Before it can get back up I drop onto it I sit myself on top of it and raise my sword pointed towards the boar and puncture it multiple times synchronized with its squeals of pain and fear.

"AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

* * *

><p>The sun is dropping slightly off the side of the earth and the sky is now the orangey color of dusk. Lying still on the grass, arms splayed with a broken sword handle on either side, I watch the sun slowly disappear from sight.<p>

As I am watching the sunset I hear the soft crunch of shoe on grass so I turn my head sideways to see Yui walking towards me with a smile on her face. She stops uncertainly a few steps away as if I was going to attack her or something if she got closer?

"Hey Daddy. Are you feeling better now?"

Well after killing boars in a killing frenzy until both my two-handed swords broke which took two hours at least I'm actually feeling a lot, I wouldn't say better, but a lot less 'I want to kill everything and anything'.

"I really did go insane back there"

"Yes Daddy, but I don't understand why"

"Ah don't worry about it, it was nothing important" I think I just went past the breaking point with the slightly insane situation of Yui, also the shocking addition of Mummy aka Kayaba. But now that I've calmed down I've gotten to realize that I was just being a bit semantic. Kayaba created Yui so he is of course her 'Mommy' in a sense. Still have no idea why I'm her Daddy, like there is literally no logical reason but I think she's won that argument.

"Hey Daddy? Are you going to keep your promise?"

"Oh…that…well you see Yui, Daddy's not going to be able to make that promise"

"Why? Please tell me"

"Because I'll starve or dehydrate because I can't eat or drink." Wait now that I mention it, I don't feel hungry, strange. By now I thought I'd be starving on the floor for not having eaten for a good five to six hours. I do have this 'want' to eat but I don't feel hungry.

I had that moment of very slow putting together the puzzle pieces but after a while of just blankly staring into the sky with this 'feeling' the pieces fell into place for me; someone had fed me in the real world. My real body was not alone, and I was not going to die of starvation or thirst.

"WOHOO!" jumping into the air with happiness, maybe I'm being over exaggerated but knowing that I'm not going to die of starvation or thirst it dazzles me with rays of hope

While laughing to the air in joy I feel a small tug on what's left of my trousers and I look down to see Yui giving me an ear to ear grin.

"Daddy is alright now?"

"Yes and Daddy will keep his promise…to Mommy" Can't believe I just said that, dammit Kayaba why'd you have to make you her Mommy.

'Yay, thank you Daddy" She hugs my leg as hard as she could which is kind of cute then looks up at me with a sad look on her face. A bit odd looking at how positive the situation had become.

"Why do you look sad Yui?"

"Well it's because Yui has to go now."

"Oh…why?"

"We'll Yui has done what she was programmed to do so Yui has to leave now. But don't worry Daddy; Yui will be watching you to make sure you keep your promise, hihi"

She gave me a last hug before skipping towards the dying sun. Her body became a shadow in the light and as the sun went under the earth and out of sight, so did Yui.

"Goodbye, Daddy"

...

...

"I guess loneliness is not considered a mental illness"

* * *

><p><strong>Omg finally learnt how to do the horizontal line thingies Halleluliagh, no more -page break- nonsense :D<strong>

**Next chapter will be out in 2 days time? 3 at the slowest but i'm an optimistic guy Watch out for the update**


	3. Chapter 3 : Apples

**Sorry about the hugely late update, had a bit of a weird week, but anyways here you go!**

Walking through town at night was probably the second creepiest thing as only the sounds of crickets and some Npc's shuffling about were heard. Along with it being dark and a low whistling wind running through the streets bringing in a chill.

The creepiest thing was the boar that was following me at a distance. Every time I would turn around to see if it was still there all I could see were two little green eyes staring up at me in the dark. The boar melded with the shadows pretty well oddly enough but I guess being dark blue and all that should be expected.

I don't even know why it's been following me it just kind of appeared when I went back to town a little while ago. Though it might have something to do with that…

.

.

-YESTERDAY. SEPTEMBER 3rd 2022-

SQUEALLL!

A burst of blue polygons fill the air as the boar dies and I heft my sword onto my shoulders.

"One boar down, another million to go"

Sure enough as I look around the field's boars graze happily by the dozens. The grinding has been slowing down since I hit level 4, well the 3 level difference between me and boars makes them so much easier to kill (well they were already 1 hit kills by level 3) but their xp value has gone down. Now I only get about a third of their usual xp.

I guess it's about time I should be moving on. I mean I have been killing boars for the past 2 days (not including the first day where I went on a bit of a massacre) and honestly it's getting way tiring to _vertical smash_ every boar I see.

I look up at the setting sun deciding that I have about an hour left but I know that won't be enough to get up level.

"Ah well might as well collect me apples."

While I was grinding yesterday I found an apple tree quite far down the field. I took most of the apples off but didn't have enough inventory space to pick the rest. The one thing those boars do is give me a lot of trash mats which fill up my inventory pretty damn quickly. Luckily because of my boosted strength I got a lot of space.

Heading off the apple tree I see the apples have all respawned.

Hmm so I have an unlimited food source, cool.

Slicing off branches with my two-handed sword (steel, new, well it was this morning but the sword is chipped and battered as hell now. Well got to get a new one tomorrow.) I get a large number of apples on the grass. Opening my inventory I go around the tree, pick and place the apples into my inventory.

"101,102,103,104…oh dammit I hit my inventory limit"

Well I GUESS I can live with 104 apples, but to leave the rest here would be a bit of a waste. Once can never have enough apples so I round up all the apples and carry them in my arms, cradle style. Sadly only about a dozen apples could stay there so I decided to leave the other 30 or so in a little pile.

With tears on my eyes for the waste of delicious apples I start to make my way back to town. Holding the apples outside my inventory was a bad idea because by some force of nature I tripped upon the air.

I mean c'mon! Who the hell trips on air? !? Of course my beloved apples go flying everywhere but only a few burst from durability loss. Groaning I pick myself up and check what tripped me, I can confirm the air was the perpetrator of my fall.

I must've looked like a total dumbass. Well never mind I'll just pick the rest up. Going down onto all fours I crawl and pile my apples in front of me, counting them off as I go.

"1 apple, 2 apples, 3 apples but this one looks a little bruised, 4 app-oh wait it just burst, 4 apples, 5 appl-"

Something's odd with the 5th apple (well 6th technically) as I notice a large pair of teeth attached to it when I pick it up. Raising my head from the ground I come within inches of two yellow eyes which are moving from the apple to make eye contact with me.

.

.

.

Tensing my arm muscle I try to pull the apple towards me but to no avail as I feel the boar try to pull the apple towards it.

I place my other hand on the apple and pull with a new fervor, all the time while keeping eye contact with the boar. It's mine now.

The boar squeals deeply tossing his head side to side taking the apple with him and of course me since I don't let go of my precious apple. It doesn't want to let go either so it just continues to fling me around incessantly.

"MUAHAHA YOU THINK I WILL LET GO FROM JUST THIS, YOU WILL HAVE TO TRY BETTER PIGG-"My lunch doesn't seem to think so however, as it rises up my throat in protest its acidy contents burning.

.

.

.

"ALLRIGHT ALLRIGHT, YOU CAN HAVE IT JUST STOP SHAKING ME PLEASE" I couldn't take much more of this boars stupid incessant shaking thanks to my motion sickness. Huh who could've thought I'd get that from being shaken by a boar.

Letting the apple go I drop onto the grass and hear the proud oink of victory come from the boar as it chomps down the apple noisily. I swear it's eating it as loud as it can just to annoy me. Swallowing hard I stop myself from chundering but the acidy taste in my mouth remains.

The loud sound of chomping comes closer until I can feel the hot breath of the boar on my ear. Ok now it's definitely doing it.

Standing up abruptly I shake my head in sadness "I was done killing boars for the day but I'll make a special exception just for you" Taking my sword out of my scabbard I prepare vertical crush and face the boar…Well where the boar was supposed to be anyway.

"Huh?"

The crunching sound came just behind me and I twirl round sword at the ready to see the boar munching on one of the apples in my pile.

"Oh now you've done it"

It gave me a surprised squeal before bolting off with all of the apples stuck in its mouth, how I do not know, but I certainly know I'll make my sword fit into that little apple munching boar.

Charging after it I chase after it across the fields for a good 10 minutes but my side started hurting then and I gave up on the chase. It's kind of strange how you can only run a certain speed depending on your Agility but you can run for pretty much forever without your body getting tired (but you get mentally exhausted). Almost like real life, though I'm usually better at running than this so I've been demoted in running skills.

What a strange boar though, never expected something like that to happen. Maybe it was something to do with the apples, I mean it did just go for the apples and took them all the greedy pig (oh how ironic). Ah well guess I'll just have to live with 104 apples then, back to town I go.

Sadly for me the day doesn't end after grinding, no siree. I have to go sell my trash mats which takes a while because the best places to sell them are on opposite sides of town. I'm not a penny pincher but it's nice to have a big fat wad of cash in your pocket. Makes you feel important in a way.

After that I have to go to Mario (I'm sure he has a pregenerated name but Mario suits him pretty good) and get my weapon repairs, honestly I just buy a new one, it's cheaper and the repairs don't always go right as my 300col waste on repairing my last steel sword taught me.

Oh it doesn't end there; I have to then find a place to stay, I mean I want to try out all the places and I've got the money to spare so why not check out all the inn rooms.

Lastly (yes I still have more to do before I can sleep) I go to the clothes shop and by myself a new shirt. Like seriously every time I get hit by a boar they just have to cause I giant rip in my shirt! I left my current shirt in the grassy field around midday because I accidentally aggroed 2 boars and the second boar gored me in the chest when I turned to face it. Thus 2 nipple holes were left so no way I was going to wear that in public.

But there's no public anyway so I don't know why I wasted a good shirt now that I reflect upon my wasteful actions. Meh I'll just buy another one.

So I head around town shopping, selling and browsing at some of the unique weapons for sale, sadly no two-handed swords were available which was a bit of a letdown because Mario really showed some promise with having a ton of normal two-handed swords and all.

Anyways I finally finish doing my restocking and resupplying and head off towards an Inn. Not any inn in particular just the first one that I come across.

Sure enough I come across a shabby looking inn pretty quick. Doing a once over on it I can tell it's a pretty shady looking place with a old wooden door with a rusty handle, black stained windows and a half broken sign. Not to mention the place is apparently called The Rabid Rat.

Eh screw it, not like the place is full of dodgy people making dark deals and criminals having a drink together. Usually an inn like this would be full of those shady characters and nasty people but since this is a game where I'm all by myself there's no one of the sort around here.

Opening the door I step inside.

I have always wondered what it would look like in one of those dodgy inns. I used to play a lot of D&D and almost every adventure started in an inn. It was like some weird non-spoken pact between DM's. They always had their own interesting interpretation of inns and I've started in a fair share of shady inns and I've noticed there were quite a few things that were recurring.

I was not disappointed in the slightest.

Inside the air was thick and damp with the smell of hops. A plump bar wench, must've been in her late 30's, served drinks at a table.

Around the table sat 4 men, wearing studded leather straps that barely hid their bulging muscles. Each of them had a number of scars in numerous places. In particular was a wide man with a shiny bald head and a long white scar running down one eye.

One of the other men, a young one with short coppery hair and a lip scar along with streaks of scars down his right arm makes a pass at the wench but his hand returns to the table knife embedded in it.

Well that's another scar to his collection.

The man roars in pain as his companions laugh heartily at him. The bald guy (He looks like the leader, must be the eye scar that does it) grins showing off his crooked yellow teeth and lack of them too.

The wench saunters off to go serve other people and I move my attention elsewhere.

There are many 'private' booths along the walls of the inn. 'Private' because the only thing separating whoever sits there from my view is a black curtain. I'm sure that if I check them out there's sure to be a dodgy business deal or an assassination plot.

I had thought this place was going to be empty but it is full of Npc's. I know I've only focused on those 4 men but they had that we're important Npc's vibe to them. Normally an inn full of Npc's wouldn't be bad but in this place it's not good, not good at all.

I start to turn for the door when I hear a rough voice from behind

"Oy you there, you looking fer a room?"

Turning towards the voice to confirm my suspicions I detect the speaker to be the barman. To all my expectations he is exactly as I thought he would be; a plump 40ish looking man with a balding head and a thin doorknocker moustache. He's wearing the sooty white wife beater and is even cleaning the mugs with a dirty dishcloth. I have to appreciate the little details that were accounted for.

"Uh, yes I am, do you have any available?"

A ping and a window appeared in front of me labeled 'Quest: Get a room'. Raising an eyebrow I scroll down reading the details, which told me to find a way to get a room, and the reward which was a room key.

Hmm, ok, well umm, reject? I don't want to do a quest to get a room jeesh.

I move my finger towards the reject button when I felt a sort of wave of killing intentions pass through me. Moving my eyes from the window I notice that everyone in the room has stopped whatever they're doing and are staring at me intently. Each and every one of them had a clear killing intention towards me and that sent a shiver all down my.

This ain't good, ain't good at all.

Saying no to the patron is like insulting him in a place like this. I appreciate the details but hate them just the same. It's like blackmail for crying out loud…but I'd rather have my life than a few coins.

Rolling my eyes with a sigh I press down and the quest window disappears. A ping and another window appears in front of me stating in big red letters 'QUEST REJECTED'… Another ping and another window appears 'SAFETY ZONE WITHIN THE RABID RAT DISABLED'

.

.

.

Well shi-"GET 'IM"

All at once they charge me barehanded roaring their battle cries. It's a terrifying yet pitiful show as some are so drunk they fall off their chairs in the rush to stand up and others stumble and fall along the way. Sadly a good dozen are on top of me within seconds.

Engulfed by the many men I get fists and boots slamming into me on all sides bringing me down to the floor. I throw one off but another takes his place almost immediately.

They drag me down to the floor and start kicking and trampling me while I watch my bar turn yellow and flicker to red. Guess there's no non-lethal damage then.

I feel oddly relaxed and lightheaded, in sync with the earth. All expect my heart which pounds relentlessly against my calmness. Sucks though, to die such a lame death. No heroics, no boss battle, just accidentally rejected a quest which leads to me being beaten to death.

What an end, though I do get a premium view of it at least as the world seems to slow down to a crawling pace; there's the foot coming to connect to my face, another one going to kick me on the side. Oh look there's another who's raising his foot to stamp on my hand; he looks very unstable on one leg, maybe if I just give it a little push…

Darting my hand out I jab the man's leg and he loses his balance immediately changing his kick into a landing.

I raise my head slightly letting the other man's foot graze across the side of my face instead of full on.

The other kicker's foot is caught in my other hand and I fling it into the air causing him to stumble back, arms spread out and push a man either side of him to the ground in an effort to stay up.

Twisting my body into a roll I slam into the unstable man's landing foot causing him to bowl over me blocking me and taking a round of kicks as I lash out at another with a sweeping kick kicking him over and into another.

Rolling out of their encirclement and pushing hard on the ground with my hands I stand up to face my encirclers most of whom are on the ground having fallen over each other in an attempt to stay up.

Bursting with adrenaline I jump onto a table beside me and crack my knuckles while shivering from head to toe with energy

"SO YOU WANNA FIGHT HUH? WELL MARV IS GONNA GIVE YOU A THRASHING YOU'LL NEVER FORGE-" A white light appeared in front of me along with a sharp pain in the back on my head. "I forgot about the oth-". The world went black.

-page break-

My reawakening was uncomfortable in the least; I woke up to having my face bash into the cobbled street. Not the nicest way to wake up.

Well at least I'm not dead seeing as though I did anger a bunch of shady people. The last thing I remembered was the sharp pain in the back of my head which must've been one of the drunken ones who had fallen over early on who did it.

Seeing as though I landed on my face, I was thrown out. Checking out my HP bar I see that it is barely up to 2% now. Hmm so they literally beat you to an inch of your life, for rejecting a quest…

"Well that's a bit harsh don't you think?" I question the sky

It is partially my fault though, I shouldn't have explored the obviously shady inn, but I also shouldn't have assumed there wasn't going to be anybody as the city is riddled with Npc's.

Well guess I'm not sleeping there then. Cracking my joints and watching my hp bar rise up to yellow (thankfully I'm now in a safe zone) I head off down to the inn I stay at last night. I don't want to explore anymore today, who knows what other ways of almost dying I'll find.

Finding the inn by the gate I head inside and ask for a room. This inn is the usual sort of inn so nothing good or bad happens around here.

The man behind the counter passes me a set of keys and I head off upstairs to a room with a window view to the outside field.

Getting in my bed after declothing I check the time to see it is only 10pm. Setting my alarm for 6am I nod off into a dreamless sleep.

-page break-

The buzzing alarm wakes me up instantly and I slam my fist on the off button. Lurching out of bed I get down to my usual workout routine.

Even though I know it doesn't help me whatsoever it's a good habit (also it's usually the only exercise I do in a day) but for the sake of not wasting much time I only do a simple 20 minute circuit of pull ups, bike sit-up and leg raises.

Finishing that up, I get dressed and head straight out of town. I open up my menu on the way fishing an apple from my inventory.

I stop at the gate with a very unamused expression on my face as I see that half my apples have gone missing. My guess is they're back at that inn. It's understandable they wanted compensation for having to beat me into a pulp but half my apples!?

Balling my hands into fists I shake them at the air in a vow to get revenge on those damn Npc's in that inn, but not right now because I'm grinding.

With that unspoken vow on my lips I head off towards the nearest spawning boar to let off a bit of steam.

-Page break

Once again I find myself by the apple tree, well ex-apple tree since I cut off all the apple branches so no apples for a while now, and sit down by it watching the landscape go pink and darken.

Today was another day of mercilessly massacring boars but the leveling has really come to a standstill. Even after hours of killing boar after boar I'm only about a third of the way to level 5 since the xp is really low for each one now.

The xp requirements go up quite a bit each level so the number of boars I need to kill are about 9 times more than at level 1, not counting the xp decrease.

At least I have a ton of trash mats to sell so money is quickly becoming no issue to me. Soon I'll be able to eat proper food (which costs as much as a new set of armour, its crazy the price of food here).

Thinking about food I open up my inventory and spawn an apple. Only 52 left… The soft crunching sound of the apple as I bite into it is a most beautiful sound and the sweet juices pouring out of the bit are so delicious.

My parents, well everyone thought I was a bit strange seeing as though my sweet tooth was for fruits not sweets. I'm obsessed with fruit because the sweetness of them is undeniably good but everyone seems to prefer the sickening chocolate or acidic sweets that make you scrunch up your face in disgust. Fruit is healthy and practical, you can also grow it in your back garden and I had a pineapple bush in mine. Fruit can also go on anything, rice, cake, salad. Hell it even goes with pizza and pasta which are to die for.

Although I wouldn't kill or die for fruit as much as I enjoy it as fruit is just a substance that without I cannot play my computer at full capacity. Also the parents really drove the 5 a day thing into me from dawn till dusk.

Munching on my apple while trying to remember what other foods that had fruit mixed with them I almost miss the soft crunch of grass to my side.

Whipping my head to the noise I spot a boar its head held low which freezes on the spot and looks up at me. No, not me, the apple.

.

.

"YOU AGAIN!" I jump up to my feet stuffing the rest of the apple core and all into my mouth before going for my sword.

The boar known that it's been caught turns around and starts to run away from me in obvious fear.

"CMGHBGHKHGE-!" Trying to speak while having most of an apple in your mouth is not the best idea one could have.

The apple blocks my throat and I start to choke. Frantically I pump my chest and spew out the apple onto the grass.

Taking a deep breath I start towards the apple and grab it. My instincts scream at me and I flung my arm upwards and just where my arm was a millisecond ago a black blur charges past with a disappointed squeal.

Keeping the apple high in the air with one hand, I drag my two-handed sword with the other. The boar trotted back towards me its eyes fixated upon the apple. It completely ignored me the guy who had a big sharp and deadly sword who has killed many many boars.

But here it was coming up to me ignoring me or not noticing I don't know but either way its coming towards me completely fixated on the apple.

"I can't believe it. I Marv the Massacrist of boars is less important than an apple, not a new fresh apple but a bitten, bruised and dirty one? Inconceivable. I WILL DESTROY YOU BOAR! "

I try to raise the sword but with one had it is impossible. The boar reaches a kicking distance and sits down its gaze kept firmly on the apple.

"OK FINE, you can have your apple but in return, I'LL TAKE YOUR LIFE!" I drop the apple and with two hands raise my sword into the air and take the open foot over head sword stance required to activate _vertical crush_.

My weapon glows a bright purple as I activate _vertical crush._

"WAHAHA YOUR TIME HAS COME BOA-" it was one of those moments when the wind swept through with a lonely moan.

.

.

.

"PIGGY COME BACK HERE"

Charging after the pig which bolted with my god damn apple in its mouth once more I scream insults at it for the best of a few minutes before the sun is on the verge of disappearing.

Throwing a vow to kill the boar I stop chasing it and let it go on its merry way for another day. Turning back to town I head back for another night contemplating on the way why my apples are being targeted by everything.

-PRESENT DAY. SEPTEMBER 4TH 2025-

I look back and sure enough the boar is still there. Gah annoying little thing, even after it steals my apples on 2 occasions it still has the nerve to stay within my sight. Oh I will kill it soon but there are a couple of things I want to find out first.

Why? Why the hell is this boar obsessed with my apples and why are its eyes green?

I have the urge to turn and run after it but it's too fast for me right now. I'll bide my time for now.

I go off to do my usual resupplying and whatnot with the boar- no you know what I'm calling it THEAPPLETHIEF and soon it'll be a dead on- keeping its 10 metre distance the whole time.

Mario's is the last stop for the night thankfully and I walk inside to see him doing the usual; standing behind his counter wiping a sword.

"Oh hello there, Welcome back to my shop, how may I help you?"

Hmm apparently I've become registered in the Npc's memory that's kinda awesome actually.

Picking a couple of new two-handed swords (the last ones broke while I grinded), 3 of them steel and 1 iron, I take them over to the counter and pay for them while Mario has a very happy smile on his face (he probably is ripping me off but eh I got some money to spare at the moment).

"Ah thank you for your purchase, may you and your friend over there have a nice day"

I COULD try out my new weapons right here…on Theapplethief (Mario gets off on a warning this time. No way in heaven or hell, will I be friends with Theapplethief). Yes that sounds good but which one should I try first? Do I scratch up one of my new steel swords or is Theapplethief only worth an iron one?

"Ahem are you allright?"

"Um yes, I will be allright" after I kill Theapplethief that is.

Theapplethief bolts out of the door probably from my obvious killing intention directed towards it.

Aaagh, the execution can wait till the morning, I'm a bit worn out from killing a ton of boars anyway, having a second chase after Theapplethief in a day would be too hellish on my mentality.

Going back to the inn by the gate (I decided I was not going to try find any other inns after yesterday) I bought the same room as before with its window looking out into the fields outside. I sat down on a chair by the table (cost me an extra 10 Col for those) and spawned an apple.

Weird how I can eat only this and be fine, in the game world that is. In the real world I'm sure someone is feeding me at meal times which is nice to know but I'm guessing it's all soup. Many my body is going to be screwed when I get outta this game

Munching on my apple and staring out into the field I contemplate what the other people are doing and whether any of them have walked into The Rabid Rat and had the same fate as me.

Finishing my food I get into bed, set my alarm an hour later than usual because I'm going to have a long day tomorrow.


	4. Chapter 4: TheAppleThief

**_Shoutout to READandWRITE11, thanks for the review man I appreciate it :D_**

_"__Daddy will keep his promise…to Mommy"- Marv _

The sun rises into view washing the landscape in a mellow yellow and I watch the shadows recede from the fields ahead of me like a wave washes away writing on sand. I watch as the light engulfs the shadows leaving nothing but a sparkling light among the grass.

Time to get going then.

Activating _Sprint_ I do a light jog across the fields watching boars spawn and get down to their usual lazy grazing of grass…Well all but one that is

.

.

.

"STOP FOLLOWING ME"

Theapplethief is still following me, found it waiting outside my door this morning. Almost got it that time but the door was too low so I got my sword stuck on the frame.

After that, it remained its usual 10 meter distance its green eyes following me all the way.

I had to go out and buy some bread this morning too, what a waste of money. Eating that tasteless bread while I have some delicious apple in my inventory really sucks but I need to protect my remaining 49 apples from that thing.

Thinking about it...Yep it completely ignored me and is still bounding along behind me with a hungry look in its eyes. I swear it can smell my apples. Thank god they're in a virtual pocket dimension and not in a tangible backpack, which would just be asking for them to get stolen by that.

Turning right on the junction I take the road into the forest and I'm really thankful for the change in scenery; having to walk into a grassy field full of fat grazing boars every day for almost a week really does bore the eyes.

The forest is well designed with young oak trees and bushes of all kinds littering the floor. The light dims slightly as the canopy thickens, must be that the trees are getting more numerous as I am jogging through.

I look at the road and am quite impressed how there's nothing on the road, must be a game thing so the roads don't get covered. Nice to know that the game developers care about us enough to let the players find their way. To their doom to be fair but hopefully they didn't have a clue about this either.

.

.

Hmm I wonder if they did know about it? Well I understand Kayaba being all crazy and controlling his own world kind of thing (well honestly I have no freaking idea why someone would do such a thing; he must have been a very lonely kid). But anyways I'd be a bit of a stretch to the imagination that the whole crew knew what the hell was going on.

Well enough of this got to focus on the task at hand. I'll ask him after I get out of here.

Opening my map which looks like a hologram, which I think is just awesome. I wonder if there is a way to make it 3D? Anyways I open up my map and check out where Horunka is placed on my map.

Arissa, my fount of knowledge for this game, had given me some useful advice on maps. There was a lot of you can place flags here and follow a quest as in the usual RPG's but she did actually give some useful knowledge; there is a town map on each floor that will show each town on the map. For someone who without an exact location would end up on the wrong side of the country (floor in this case) knowing where towns are instead of exploring and most likely finding dangerous locations is a real life-saver, in a literal sense would be appropriate here.

As far as the map tells me Horunka is just straight North West and the road is going that way so my journey is going to be nice and relaxing without worries of any kind.

.

.

Except that one of course.

Flicking my head back I confirm that theapplethief is still bounding behind me.

"Just ignore it, imagine it isn't there waiting for you to take out an apple"

Continuing a light jog down the road for quite a while looking at the great detail on the trees and the vines that crawled around them. I also looked at the red bricked road swept unnaturally clean and of course looked at the greenness of the leaves…

It would have been a good time if not for the hungry whine coming from behind me that slowly grew in pitch and volume until it came to thi-"SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-I can't hear myself, all I hear is- EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-it's ok just look at the calm and QUIET nature-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-SHUT-EEEEEEEEEEEE-UP-AAOW!"

.

.

I turned on theapplethief with holding bits of my hair (that hurt!) and it was sitting there giving me a very confused look

EEEL?

"WHAT DO YOU WANT?"

It smiled, it actually freaking smiled. If it could talk I could just imagine it saying; well…

It doesn't need to finish that sentence because I can just feel what it wants, like some weird instinct the word 'Apple' came to mind.

"Oh…so you want an apple then?"

It rolling on its back tongue lolling out was an obvious gesture I guessed right, this boar is wiiierd. It's acting a bit like a dog actually looking all playful and vulnerable like that.

.

.

.

I take a step towards theapplethief

"I think you deserve an apple for following me all day don't you think so?"

His wiggling of his feet (hooves, legs I don't know what they are for a boar) show agreement and I take another step towards it

"So I think I'll give you one" another step

Theapplethief springs to its feet and looks at me most hungrily. Almost there…

"Ah but first you must do some tricks for me ok?"

I'm not sure it was even listening to me because it seems to be scanning for the apple with all its might but I'll just continue on

Another step

"Ok first…play dead"

It stops scanning and looks at me for a second before cocking its head sideways in confusion

"Oh don't know how to play dead? Well…LET ME SHOW YOU HOW!" Ripping my sword out of the inventory I slice through the air towards theapplethief who looks in confusion before I smash my sword into it.

Dust rises into the air from the spot where my sword landed, whew a dusty old road this one.

"VICTORYYYYY!" No moment has felt sweeter than this. Not when I finished my midterm exams or when I bought every game on my wishlist. Not even when I ate all 60 hotdogs in less than an hour for a contest (felt good for about two seconds, what happened next I will never ever think about again. Eugh) . Nothing has ever made me feel as relieved and truly satisfied I am right at this moment, when I killed theapplethief.

While I'm celebrating my victory the dust clears and I see the boar lying flat on one side.

Of course some higher power, you know what I'm blaming Kayaba for this one, decides that they want a good laugh. If he gets a kick out of the soul wrenching, heart shattering despair that he causes me well then good for him because that's exactly how I feel.

It's lying there dead, or well it looks like it except for the fact that its tail is furiously beating against the ground in anticipation and its squeathing? (Breathing that sounds like a squeal? Kind of reminds me of a dogs pant).

At the last second it must have dodged, no, it played dead. It actually played freaking dead… Oh the irony just burns!

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Well there's no point in trying to kill it now, it'll just run away the damn thing. That is not the worst part though. The worst is that I promised it an apple and it is looking at me expectantly waiting for its reward…

48 apples left then, as I am a man of my word (and also I don't want any more of that squealing, it'll drive me crazy)

Taking an apple from the inventory and giving it a last look of pain, I sacrifice it to theapplethief. I drop the apple and it is caught before it hits the ground by theapplethief but it didn't seem like it stopped moving as it just kind of went past the teeth and straight down the gullet.

"At least chew for crying out loud" A real pig this one (the irony of my own statement is not lost on me)

Theapplethief having finished its meal (well it didn't exactly start) looked back up at me with a hungry look

"Don't be greedy, only one apple for you"

"Oink?"

"Then you shouldn't have gulped that one down"

"Oink"

I can't take the puppy eyes it's giving me anymore so I turn away and start to continue down the road. Soon enough the soft clip of its hooves are on the road behind. At least no more squealing, my sanity will be in check for a little while longer.

-Page break-

Hmm it's been another little while (checked the time on the menu and it was close to 5pm) and as my poor old sanity expected it had started again. 47 apples are left now and I had to suffer through tasteless bread for lunch (I stopped for a good 10 minute break, jogging non-stop is a real pain in the side, literally) in fear of the apple being stolen of course.

I should take a break and set camp before it gets too dark; the sun is hanging pretty low (well I can't see it but there's a lot less light, there wasn't much to being with anyway but it's a difference) so finding a good spot is probably best done before I'm surrounded by darkness and nasty night monsters.

The question is do I go off the road? I mean finding my way back on it isn't that big of a problem but-AOOOOOOOOOOO-that is

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Right road it is.

Taking out a large quantity of t-shirts (The monsters go through them quite a bit, I should really get some armor) I dump them, well 'arrange' them like a bed on the road.

The wind is cold but not the 'I'm going to freeze to death' cold, just more of an annoying cold that slaps you awake just as you're falling asleep. I guess having 60 spare shirts is absolutely perfect.

Sitting down on the shirts (carefully, sadly there is still a road beneath and no poof the shirts) I scroll past my apples, stopping momentarily to linger and desire at one, and then take out a piece of bread.

I place my sword on the floor by the bed because who knows when I'll need it and get down to the unextravagant meal before me. As I chomp through the first bite feeling nothing a small oink makes me clutch at the bread with a deathly grip.

Whipping my head round I see theapplethief looking at me hungrily with its big green eyes.

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I place my bread back into the inventory (and mark it; might as well finish it later) and then take out an apple.

Just like a puppy that's seen a ball theapplethief lowers its head to the ground with its butt in the air, tail waggling (just seriously, what is this boar?).

"Are you hungry?"

The squeathing begins.

"Yes I'm hungry too but I have to eat this bread see" I take some bread out of my mouth (it's a boar, it doesn't mind) and chuck it over. Ok well maybe it minded a little because it took a sniff then pushed it away with its hoof.

"It's not very good anyway, smart choice. You know what how about we both eat what we want to eat ok?"

Tongue lolling and wriggling on its back, it's most definitely thinking about the apple just waiting there right in my hand.

"You can have the apple once I figured out what I want…Hmm, ah yes. I feel like eating…BOAR!" Screaming my battle cry with fury I lift my sword with my right hand and, well it doesn't go any further

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"OH DAMMIT" the damn sword won't move because it's two-handed and I'm trying to wield it one-handed. A sudden wind by my free hand makes me turn back and see that my hand is free.

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"GOD DOUBLE DAMMIT" Assuredly enough the happy oink announces the end of that apple.

I know I don't have the best luck but to have both my plans screw up and lose 3 apples in the process?

Today is really not my day, I should not try anything else tonight or I'll be bound to lose another precious apple.

It's only about 6:30 but eh screw it I've been jogging all day (well I got a bit lazy and started power walking a bit after lunch). Wrapping myself as tightly as possible and beating my shirt pillow into a plump shape, I get ready to sleep.

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Anytime now would be good.

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Brrrrrr, where'd that come from? Ah there's a hole there, I'll just block it with a shirt

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Ah nice and cozy but maybe I went to bed too early because sleep is not catching up with me.

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Oh there it is, hello sleep I've been waitibrrrrrr. Where's the hole?

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Ah there it is. Let's make sure there aren't any more… Nope. Ok sleep come back.

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Brrrrrrr, what?

I get out of my bed and make it into a nest like shape, with a top of course. The shirts must be too thin to keep all the cold out so I have to layer them.

Finishing my work of art (well at least it doesn't make me sick by looking at it, just uncomfortable) I delve in and drown myself in shirts.

Aaah, much better. It's still a bit cold but at least it's bearable.

Sleep came to me quick, which I appreciate.

-Page break-

*BRING BRING* "uhhhhh" *BRING BRING* "yes yes I'm getting up jeesh"

Slamming my palm on the bedside table I narrowly miss the clock and hit a plastic soldier with a painted red armband. The sharp pain in my palm followed by the sad scrunching sound woke me right up.

"Colonel Sanders! Nooo!" removing my palm to see a slightly bent Colonel Sanders (phew he isn't broken) I rub the pain away.

*BRING BRI*

Turning off the alarm successfully this time I force myself out of bed, keeping an eye where my feet go. Thank god I did because I avoid stepping on my 3rd polish cavalry division (that would have hurt).

Moving nimbly towards my dresser I wonder whose turn is next and quickly find out with my notebook, which I pick up on the way.

"hmm seems it's your turn lads" I turn to look at the British paratrooper division that currently resides on my top bookshelf. Mah I'll do them on the way out.

Opening up my dresser to see my pathetic excuse for a wardrobe; 7 pairs of clothing, guess what? One for each day. Hell my underwear and socks have their respective days stitched onto them. I should really start buying my own clothes.

She does spend money on me though so I can't complain but I'm 18 I should have an absolute ton of clothes. Well now that I think about it, I have a whole drawer full of pj's.

Normal people get underwear, socks and jumpers for Christmas. Me? I get pj's. Every year, no exceptions. I even got a special one with a giant 18 on the back for last Christmas.

Just my luck that I celebrate my birth on the same day as everyone is opening their presents. Being a Christmas baby can sometimes really suck, only half the presents as they come together (well on the bright side at least I'm not a leap year baby, those guys are just screwed when it comes to birthdays).

Hmm anyways back to what I'm going to wear. I should wear Tuesday's clothes but it's a shirt and tie. Nope not for me! I'd rather go in my pj's and actually I think I will.

Putting on my big dark blue pj's with a big white 18 on the back I feel so much more comfortable than I would with having a tie around my neck like a noose (I'm not the biggest fan of them).

Satisfied with that I close my dresser and head towards my paratroopers. Taking the measuring tape next to them I measure out 27 inches, move them that distance and then place them on the floor in my makeshift woods. Grabbing a chunk of little white 6-sided dice I chuck them over my bed (it's the only free place to do it) and kill the troops with AA defenses accordingly.

"Man you guys took a beating" About half of them are dead, another 6 off course and 1 got stuck in a tree.

Well that was a good bit of fun before the day starts. Leaving them there I make my way to my door, open it slightly and squeeze through the gap.

I should really upgrade to proper figurines but they cost a ton and also I step on my soldiers more often than not so I'd rather not get a steel blade or painted chainsaw through my foot.

Heading downstairs I head towards the kitchen stopping at the house phone on the way and pressing play for all the left messages.

"Hello son and good morning to you too! I got called to work early because of reasons but I left the milk and cereals on the table, also there is dinner in the fridge just in case I come back late. Don't forget to wash your teeth after eating and also have a shower, you know you need to be hygienic"

"Jeez mum I know"

"Um…what else? Oh I accidentally blended one of your soldiers; you shouldn't just leave them lying around in the cupboard like that"

Don't worry about it, I have a whole suitcase of them" Honestly it'd have to be a big suitcase.

"Lastly have fun at school, muah I love you" *end of message*

"Love you too Mum"

Getting a set I pour my cereals (special hidden Captain Crunch, mom would go crazy if she saw me eat this sugar overloaded monstrosity of a cereal) in to the bowl and start eating it. Screw the milk, it just dulls the sugar rush and on Tuesdays I need this kind of energy.

I do pour myself a glass of milk (I did forget to get some juice out of the fridge but eh milk is good for you) once I finish eating and down it in a gulp.

"Ahhh"

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Well time to go.

Picking up my bag from the front door and taking the house keys I exit into the sunlight, hissing as its bright rays shine upon me.

"Ah we meet again Sun; you should really brighten down because you're blinding me here"

I do spend too much time cooped up in my house where the blinds are always closed so I shouldn't be surprised to have a vampire like reaction to the sun.

Walking through my pitiful excuse for a lawn (it's two patches of grass either side of the walkway, pitiful) I unlock and then lock (oh dammit I FORGOT TO CLOSE THE DOOR), and then unlock it again and go close the door and lock that.

Finally getting out with everything locked I peek my head towards the neighbors garden as and see the petite young girl, with curly brown hair that looks like it's been on a train wreck pretty much all the time, step out the door saying 'Goodbye' to her parents.

She hisses at the sun when it hits her face (ha! I'm not the only one) but adjusts to it with a tired mug on her face. Upon seeing me though she turns that frown upside down and charges in for a hug.

"Neighbour-chan!" Barreling into me for what was supposed to be a hug, the air is knocked out of me and she gives me a big hug around the waist literally squeezing the air out of me.

"u-u-uh S-ara- l-et-g-o-I-can-t-bre-athe"

"Oh sorry Neighbour-chan are you allright?" She releases me from her death hug and I lustfully gasp in the air.

"It's ok, I'm good now. So where's Arissa?"

"Big sis is upstairs, what are you wearing?" I guess she just noticed,

"A…tracksuit, that happens to be dark blue with a giant 18 on its back and looks suspiciously like pajamas."

She cocked her head looking at me. "You're weird Neighbour-chan, hihihi."

"Well yes, yes I am, now run off to school I'll get Arissa out of bed"

"Ok Neighbour-chan, bye!"

Waving Sara off I head towards the closed door to their house and turn the handle to open the door.

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Hmm I don't touch many door handles but I'm sure it's not supposed to feel like….hair

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I close my eyes wondering why the door handle is strange. I move around the handle to see whether it was some weird figment of my imagination but no, the whole handle had this odd hair, like short bristly hair sort of feel to it.

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My eyes fly open and darkness greets me, odd. Well I am under quite a few layers of shirts but that's not what makes the darkness odd. What makes it odd is that it is warm, weirdly warm for how cold the night was.

*Yawn*

I was having such a good dream as well. I wonder what woke me up? I feel another yawn come up and I raise my hand to stifle it

*YaWN?*

My hand, seems to be stuck under something…and that something is breathing…Oh that's what it is

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OH THAT'S WHAT IT HOLY MOTHER OF FREAKING GOD IS!

My left hand is thankfully free from captivation so I place it between me and theapplethief who is snoring lightly and push it away.

God that thing must eat a lot of apples because it's hell of an exercise to move it even an inch.

I move theapplethief only little bit then take a quick breather, then get back down to it.

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It's back where it started, huddled up to me and fast asleep.

Moving it away from me once more I keep an eye on it to make sure it doesn't come back. As expected it does, it kind of sleep drifts? Towards me. Maybe it's drawn towards my warmth or something who knows.

Pushing against it with all my might I stop the boar from huddling by me and free my other hand. With both hands I open up a hole and push the boar outside. It lies there on the road for a few seconds snoring happily before it wakes up looking a bit confused about the surroundings. It then comes towards me to which I close the hole on it. I' m not having that thing sleep inside my little shirt nest.

I huddle tightly listening to the soft sad oink coming from outside

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Reopening the hole I let theapplethief back in and have it huddle by me for its sake (well honestly it was getting really cold inside and it seems like theapplethief's a good insulator.

I open up my menu which gives off a little light followed by an oinked displeasure

"Yes yes ill turn it off just checking the time" It's about 4am, man theapplethief must have been here for a while now, just how long did I have my arm under theapplethief? (It's still a bit numb so must have been pretty long).

Swiping my menu away I let the applethief snuggle into my arms (really appreciating the warmth) and let sleep take me once more to her lands of dream.


	5. Chapter 5: Arrival at Horunka

**Well firstly thanks READandWRITE11 for reading again :P and also I found out how to do line breaks (I forgot ok but no more -page break- anymore)**

_Just like a puppy that's seen a ball theapplethief lowers its head to the ground with its butt in the air, tail waggling (just seriously, what is this boar?).- Marv_

"Finally a bit of fresh air" I take a nice deep breath.

I'd been stuck in the woods for the past day and a bit, just trotting on the road nothing else. It was really boring jogging for hours on end with no nice sights to see.

Seriously I swear the designers just gave up individualizing the trees and mass produced them for the thick of the forest. Just rows and rows of monotonous trees that all look exactly the same. Add a whole lack of sunlight and literally zero encounters; you have a very boring trip.

I would have thought I'd encounter at least one monster, wolves in particular since I heard them every so often but apparently not. Maybe it's some weird road is special safe spot thing, who knows.

That was one of the strange things about my short journey here. The other was Theapplethief; it just decided to disappear. I woke up in the morning and it was gone, don't know where and all my apples were accounted for (well of course that'd be the first thing to check when it comes to that boar).

It might've been that it had despawned for some reason or just decided to leave. I have no idea what it's thinking about half the time and the other half all it thinks about is apples.

Well wherever it went I was more than certain it'll come back, hell I have apples so that's a definite. There was no point worrying about it anyways, I might not get to kill it for another day but it's just one more day, I can wait.

"Ah screw that boar I just hope it comes back alive so I can kill it"

Strolling into the field at the edge of the forest I bathe in the bronze sunlight of the afternoon sun. Another day gone and I've barely done anything, gah. Well I must make the best of the rest of it then.

Thankfully I don't need to check on my map where Horunka is (having it sat in my view for the whole day just in case I went in the wrong direction really made it a sight that I didn't want to see anymore. I had enough of staring at a digital screen all day, just not my thing I guess.

Horunka appears to be as insignificant as its name; it has around 10 houses with a picket fence encircling them. It is quite a pitiful sight for a city man like me. A good village should have at least 100 buildings and a proper wall encircling it. This is like a street market you'd find in the town plaza every Sunday, well a bit bigger than that. It's more like the plaza itself, but that is still pretty tiny even for a village.

Surrounding the village is a large expansive field, so at least the view is nice, and around that seems to be a forest, on this side at least.

Heading over to Horunka I pass multiple boars that spawn and graze on the grass beside them. Raising my eyebrow inquisitively I go over to one.

Sadly my suspicions are correct that they are the same as the ones back in Starting City's field as I behead a boar in one _vertical crush_, also I knew by the lousy xp.

However I did get a ping and a widow appearing in front of me which is surprising to say the least. Peering at the window I see it tells me that my Two-Handed skill has improved to 100 and that I learnt _Thrust_.

Opening my skills window I check out the _Thrust_ skill. The description read: A charge skill where you grab your weapon and thrust it deep into the enemy.

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I imagine the one who wrote this tried so desperately to make it a connotation, oh how sad.

At the bottom of the description is a little link so I press it and a video tutorial of a blank avatar showing a step by step use of _Thrust _appears. It puts the sword pointed towards the enemy by the gut and the sword starts to glow green. Then it takes a step forward and the sword juts out forward leaving a green trail behind.

Hmm well that's a bit iffy for a skill, I'd rather just vertical crush.

A second video then appears and the avatar does the same preparation but starts running in a straight line while keeping the skill on. Woah, I retract my last statement. Being able to move with sword skills is actually pretty awesome as far as I can tell; I have to stop moving each time I attack but this just lets me run with it.

I look up at the receding sun as guess I have just over an hour before dark so I select a sacrifice to practice my new skill.

Placing myself directly by the boar I ready _Thrust_ watching my blade grow green. Then I impale the boar and watch it burst into polygons. Hmm, pretty cool. The delay after the skill is not so cool as I remain immobile for about a second, almost twice as long as the other skills.

That is pretty dangerous to say the least. Not being able to move a muscle for a second could really screw me up later in the game. This skill will not be used often if I can help it.

However I do need to check out the charge part of it so I target and boar and charge towards it _Thrust_ activated. Sure enough the damage is increased slightly by the charge but the delay is almost doubled the previous one. My god I'll never be using this skill, even if I can't help it.

I almost go to town but then I decide to do a last test of this new skill. I charge with it but not at any boar but just along the open fields. The skill stays activated as I run across the field but I have this weird feeling all throughout that I'm confined to a very narrow corridor.

I try to turn but it is like my body is in a narrow corridor… I stop moving and deactivate the skill and honestly don't think I'll ever activate it again. It does decent damage, a bit less than_ Vertical Crush _and a lot more after-delay but I can move with it, as long as it's in a straight line. So overall it's pretty bad.

Feeling a bit miffed off about the next to useless skill gained from my Two-handed skill 100 milestone, I head towards Horunka.

Jumping over the picket fence, because why the hell not, I enter the safety zone for Horunka. Close up it looks like a peaceful little village with some Npc's milling about and talking to their neighbours (by the looks of it everyone is your neighbor here, quite like back home.).

Basically just swiveling my head round while standing in the center of town I can see every building and I can spot what looks like a forge, an inn and a bunch of houses. Well might as well explore it tomorrow, not like it's going anywhere.

Heading off to the building that looks like an inn (it has a sign, it's the best I got to recognizing it as an inn) I open the door a let the inside warmth pour over me.

Aaah, seems like someone had lit a fire inside as it is like walking into a thick duvet that wraps around you smothering you in heat. Aaah, so relaxing.

Sure enough it is an inn however the place is deserted except for the aging bartender behind the counter. I say aging but I almost mistook him for the old famer guy that stereotypically sits by the bar. Hmm, maybe it is and he's just filching some drinks.

"How may I help you?" He looks towards me with a curious glance

"Can I have a room for the night, preferably with a window view to the town center. Also does it have a fireplace with table and chairs?"

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Hmm maybe I was a bit too specific.

A window pings and I see the payment for a room. Oh apparently not, interesting. Deducting my Col I pay for the room for a week.

Stifling a yawn I head upstairs waving off the innkeeper with the back of my hand. Finding my room was simple because the door has a cyber bluish tint to it, I think it's so that you don't have to try every door to figure out which is yours. That would be awkward.

Heading inside to be greeted by a chilly room I immediately head to the fire and stuff in the required ingredients for a window to appear and ask me if I'd like to light it.

Without having to wait for an age blowing at the embers and getting vats of smoke washing over my face, the fire springs to like sending a nice calming warmth past me and slowly fills up the room with it. Ah sometimes I just love the game world, the little things really do make it great.

Getting ready for bed I make a mental task list of things to do, this and that and that other thing too was pretty much all I could come up with. Details are not my forte. I am meticulous in the date however and open up the message window, input myself and send the date to myself. 7th of September, 2022. Hmm school should be starting in a few days, well didn't really make any difference to me seeing as though I had summer school. Man that sucked but at least my grades are normal again.

Lying under the pitiful excuse for a cover (very thin sheets. Seriously what about a nice warm duvet it's a game at least let us sleep comfortably) I shiver slightly as I feel the warmth pushing the cold off of me, wiping me clean of chill and warming me to the bone.

Thankfully sleep is riding with the warmth and I meet her pretty soon.

* * *

><p>Waking up to the morning sunshine is great, the mellow yellow rays caressing my face gently and the soft sound of chirping birds filling the air. That would be the perfect way to wake up; however for me no such thing would ever happen.<p>

I woke up to utter darkness with the fire out and the room being chilly. No birds only the damn crickets were out and of course there's scratching at my door. Scratching at my door I mean c'mon what the hell scratches your door in the middle of the night in a game. Unless it's a freaking horror game which this is not so what is that scratching?

I want to check it out but I don't want to get even colder than I already am. So I have the option to force sleep and leave the creepy door scratching, or freeze and check out the door scratching which would most likely turn out to be the figment of my imagination and be a complete waste of my time and heat. Also on the off chance that the scratching is some horrible horror thing then I'd rather not open the door.

Option sleep it is then.

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Though knowing my luck the scratching is probably some horrible horror thing that would freak me to death so maybe I should light the fire to keep it away. Maybe, but then I'd have to get out of bed so ugh.

Easiest to just convince myself that it's all good and that's exactly what I'm going to do.

"It's an RPG, there will be no horror stuff going on where people sleep, in other places…possibly. Why is this so? Well because there's no way someone would be sadistic or evil enough to-"

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I get up equip my clothes and take out an iron sword. Setting to a thrust position I activate _Thrust_ which dimly lights the room green. Gulping I listen to the scratching as it continues relentlessly for minute after minute. It sounds more like whatever's back there is trying to dig through the door than just scratch it. Maybe it's hungry.

Damn it Kayaba, why do you have to do this? I just want to have a nice peaceful night of sleep but you decide to try mentally traumatize me with whatever's behind that door.

Well maybe it was just one of the designers idea of a joke, then it wouldn't be that bad…hopefully. In all honesty I have no idea about those people, for all I know the innkeeper is scratching at my door because he's hungry for my flesh.

I do wonder how it would feel if he did eat parts of me, would I be screaming in pain or just sitting there with a tingling pain watching him eat me. Hmm, an interesting thing to consider but I'd rather not make the wonderings a reality.

Getting out of bed I take the chair in my room and lean it against the handle. Then I move the table next to it further reinforcing the door. Moving to the fire I relight it and let the warmth fill me with peace, which is quickly ruined as

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Where'd the scratching go?

I focus solely on listening but don't hear a single peep, nothing, nada. It was at the door just seconds ago but now, it's gone.

Hmm I don't know whether to be relieved as it is gone or be terrified that it is gone. I have no idea, the only thing I have is the memory, quite apparent for this moment, of a poem that Arissa used whenever she played horror games (I never played just watched her and cried in a corner after each jump scare if I remember correctly):

"If whenever you hear a scary sound,

Just sit in the light and hope to not be found,

If the sounds you can no longer hear,

Then the coast is clear.

Be careful though,

For it's probably a trap to make you go,

To the outside,

And DIE."

Well that really calmed my nerves. In another universe where I was still sleeping happily without creepy scratching noises of course. In this universe that song really incited my fear. Gah, never sign a song about a horrible situation when you're in that same situation.

I have no intention of making it worse so I stay put by the fire holding my sword out in thrust position (man my arms hurt holding this thing up) towards the door.

I wait, for minutes and minutes, then those minutes turn into an hour, then into two. All that time hearing nothing but almost feeling the presence on the other side of the door just waiting for it to open, Yes I can feel it's desire slipping through the cracks in the door and directing themselves towards me. I can sense the coldness of the being on the other side of the door and its want, its need to warm itself with me. This desire I can almost imagine it licking my hands with hunger. It must be hungry, very very hungry. It's so hungry in fact that it could eat 10 no, 100 apples.

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Apples?

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Smashing the table out of the way with my sword and flinging the chair out of the way, I rip open the door to see a boar sleeping in the corridor sleeping silently.

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"I'M GOING TO FREAKING KILL YOU, YOU LITTLE PIGGY! YOU FREAKED THE HELL OUT OF ME SCARING ME HALF TO DEATH BY SCRATCHING THE DOOR. WHAT KIND OF PIG SCRATCHES AT A DOOR IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FREAKING NIGHT! WHAT KIND OF PIG SCRATCHES AT A DOOR IN THE FIRST PLACE! ARGH YOU ARE DRIVING ME INSANE!"

Of course Theapplethief flees away from my furious rage but it runs past me, and into my bed digging into the covers, hiding underneath.

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I take a deep breath allowing the rage to subside enough to let me think rationally before turning on the pig that cowers under my covers

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THE BED?"

The small bulge in the covers moves towards the edge of the bed and Theapplethief slinks off the bed

"GOOD, YOU WILL STAY THERE TONIGHT, YOU WANTED TO BE WARM BUT YOU WILL STAY COLD, BE GREATEFUL I DON'T RIP YOU INTO PIECES WITH MY BARE HANDS BECAUSE THE URGE TO DO THAT IS SO VERY STRONG RIGHT NOW"

Theapplethief lies on the floor with a sad oink and closes its eyes sniffling.

I let loose a bit of steam by pulverizing the table (well it is an immortal object so all I accomplished to pulverize is my sword). Then once I put my broken sword back into my inventory I turn back to Theapplethief

I give it the best death glare I can well up before stepping over it and back into bed. I want to kill it so badly, it wouldn't just make my day and it would be as if I had achieved a life's goal bringing pleasure so exquisite everything else in my life would be forever dull.

However I don't want to kill it. Weird how I want to kill it but I don't want to at the same time. Why, I'm not quite sure but I believe it's curiosity. I'm curious about why I knew that the thing on the other side of the door was Theapplethief; how I knew it was hungry for apples. It must be some weird game system thing that happens when one spends a lengthy time (longer than I would normally spend) with an AI or something.

Also why is it following me? Oh wait I am its food supply since I took all the apples so ok I guess it has to follow me if it wants to eat. But still, what is with this boar?

I lie in bed for a few minutes thinking about all the possibilities of why this is happening until apples pops into my head.

I close my eyes and sigh, who would ever think I would slowly be turned insane by apples, not even the apples themselves, just the word apple.

I roll to the side and peer down at the boar. Unsurprisingly it is already looking towards me with hungry green eyes.

*Sigh*

I take an apple out of my inventory and tell Theapplethief to sit which it does with lightning speed. It stays as still as stone except for its tail waggling furiously.

"Just because I don't want you whining through my sleep ok" I hand it the apple which it takes and devours it passionately within seconds.

I roll back to sleeping position convinced that my sleep will now go undisturbed.

Ping "I'll kill you tomorrow"

Hmm? Did I just hear a ping?

Opening up an eye I see a window, on low brightness, (thank you whoever was so thoughtful to do this to the menu at night) saying 'I'll kill you tomorrow'

"Huh?"

I open up the other eye and blink a few times to make sure I'm not seeing things. Apparently I'm not; the window in front of me says 'Pet name: I'll kill you tomorrow. Confirm or Reject?'

.

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"HUH?" I lurch out of bed and slap myself, pinch myself and look at my palm. Nope I'm still awake.

And my eyesight is just fine. Arissa never said anything about pets but well apparently there are?

I glance at Theapplethief who is sleeping soundly then whip my head back to the pet name window.

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I…have no idea what to do. I don't know whether to call it something or run screaming from the room and run as far as possible. I don't know if I should kill it now that it's sleeping.

Mom never let me had pets, mostly because I had already had them when I was younger and because we learnt it was a bad idea to leave me and pets together. We used to have a pooch called Minto but he ate one of my figurines causing him to choke and die. We buried him in the garden the day after he came into the house. I was about 6 then.

That wasn't the end though; my Mom wanted me to have an animal friend so she got me a cat for my 7th birthday. I accidentally put it into the tumble drier and drowned it. It got a grave next to Minto (I forgot the cats name, it seemed to have been washed away with time).

For my 10th birthday (she waited a couple of years for me to grow up some) I got a pet hamster. Captain Jerry I named it. I remember the name because I used to put it into my King Tiger tank as its spotter. I had fun with it for about a week until I did an air drop with the tank (I was a really stupid child my god). Mom had to clean up the mess on the floor (I cleaned the tank myself) before digging the third grave.

After that we gave up trying to have a pet in the house because I seem to kill them all. Though in this predicament where I want to kill Theapplethief, maybe my bad luck with animals may actually be good for once.

Though if Theapplethief was my pet then I wouldn't want to die on me just like the other times, at least not instantly. I've wanted a pet since the Jerry incident but Mom always said that pets were a lot of responsibility and I'm not responsible enough to have one, although if I did have a pet it'd have to last at least a month for me to be counted as responsible (we both thought that if something could live with me for more than a week then they'd be extremely lucky. So a month was hitting the boundaries of impossibility).

Shaking my head to discard the horrible past of pets I return back to the task at hand; the naming of this one. Calling it 'Theapplethief' would be too much of a pain.

I press reject which wipes the screen clean. "Tath". Hmm, how about…I clean the screen once more. "Tath Vader". Ha that works cool, but no Tath (Theapplethief) works just fine on its own. Also having Vader follow me around would be a little weird.

Anyways So I decide the name to be Tath (for Theapplethief. So much easier than having to say Theapplethief every time) and enter that then confirm.

A congratulations window appears telling me that Tath is now officially my pet.

Well that's that, it explains why its eyes were green and whatnot else about it.

A large shadow darkens half my body and Tath flops on my arms half crushing them in the process

"Oh so you think that just because you are my pet you can now sleep on the bed?"

Tath rolls onto his back and gives me a look that I can deduce to say 'why yes of course'.

Rolling my eyes I crash back down onto the bed pulling the covers from underneath Tath and covering myself. Tath of course burrows its way under the covers and takes a spot by my chest snuggling in. At least this time it didn't sleep on my arm.

Within seconds I can feel Tath sleeping soundly, how it does it I do not know. I must learn its secrets. But until then I'll wait patiently for sleep to come. I look down at Tath with a slight tinge of worry but also a hint of sadistic happiness.

"Let's see how long you last, I'm betting on you lasting only 2 weeks and that's an optimistic bet too."

**Ok so just a quick question to y'all, is the reading fine or do I need more spaces between the paragraphs so its not some wall of text that hurts your eyes?**

**ALSO i got the dates wrong (its 2022 not 2025 so oops Marv is playing 3 years later than everyone else oops :P (I went and changed it so we're all good now)**


	6. Chapter 6: Questing

**_Shoutout to BeastZoroark145, I have three words for you: Thanksfor readingand reviewing (shuush its '3' words ok :P)_**

_"__Let's see how long you last, I'm betting on you lasting only 2 weeks and that's an optimistic bet too."- Marv_

"OOMPH"

The goat smashes into me lifting me off the ground and tossing me to one side. Crashing into the ground I lose a decent 30% of my health and place my sword on top of me hastily.

Just in the nick of time as the goat head-butts me once more sending me further back on the plateau, the sword taking the brunt cracked slightly.

My face connecting once more with the ground I lurch my sword into a defensive position adrenaline pumping and vision blurred from the multiple head to floor bangs.

It comes again bleating angrily, bleating for my death. A black shadow barrels into it from the side and the two forms tumble around one another; the white goat and Tath do make a good ying yang tumbling like that.

No time to appreciate the art I stand up to go help Tath and using my sword as a crutch I stand against the dizziness.

Tath has gained the upper hand and now shakes its head furiously with tusks embedded within causing bleats of shock and pain.

Speedily walking towards them I raise my sword, activate _Vertical crush_ and behead the goat.

With a last bleat it bursts into the digital blue polygons that signify victory.

"Phew that was a close one" Sure enough I lost about 80% of my health as I take a peek and see the flashing red bar. Maybe I should put some points into vitality.

I go to a cliff edge then sit legs dangling down. Damn that's high. Hmm maybe I should try pushing them off the edge.

I give a look at Tath who is staying well away from the edge. Guess I can't ask for it to push the others over the cliff then. Man I have to find a better way to fighting these things; getting knocked about while Tath charges them is so painful and the headache aaagh. At least the world isn't spinning any longer so that's something.

Though having Tath do a lot of the damage gives him a good xp boost. Party settings (Apparently I'm in a party with a boar which is a bit strange but hey I don't make the rules of this game, the possibly crazy psychopathic game designers did. Although they do make some good scenery.) allow me to change xp split options so whoever deals most damage gets more xp. Pretty useful to level Tath up. Poor thing is only level 3 (the monsters here are only level 4-5 so the level difference isn't that bad) as it did start from level 1.

Thank god I got Tath so early, though I wonder if you get a pet at a later level do they start from level 1 too. I wouldn't doubt the logic behind that knowing that those game designers may not be the most 'healthy' people in the world.

I peek back at Tath who remains cowering far away from me.

"Oh cmon, you're not still mad about that are you? I said I was sorry" I learnt to not give Tath a hard pat on the back while it is sitting on the edge of a cliff. Well at least I pulled Tath up (by his nose, well there was nothing else to grab onto) to safety.

Tath of course does not forgive, except maybe for an apple, I have that sort of feeling that an apple will solve the situation. Ah I've still got 39 left so I can sacrifice one for an apology.

Or maybe I could use it for better purposes

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I take an apple out of my inventory immediately feeling the apple vibe from Tath and sure enough I see it to be eating the apple lustily with its eyes. Oh apple you are going to be a very worthy sacrifice indeed.

"Hey Tath…You want to play some catch?"

I don't think he listened. Nope all he's thinking and hearing is apples right now. How I know this? Simple; it is some weird background noise in my head. I no longer have that strange buzzing sound in the back of my head, no that's been replaced with a constant string of 'apple, apple, apple'. I mean it isn't that annoying, it becomes sort of white noise, but when I'm sleeping I've just been having dreams of apples, swimming and drowning in them.

That was hell of a nightmare; all the ways of getting killed by apples. I was pelted to death by them, stuffed to bursting (literally), slowly burnt by them (that was just weird, having apples rubbing against me so fast I literally caught on fire. Never would've dreamed that in a lifetime, except I did so hmm ironic…) and of course being drowned in a sea of apples.

Eating them has now made them that more enjoyable. It's like a victory as there is one less that can kill me (strange but it gets my mood up when I'm down from having the daylights beaten out of me by various creatures).

I realize I've been day dreaming for a bit as Tath is moving its head anxiously wanting to get the apple but not get close to the edge.

Grinning like a fool (internally of course, I wouldn't want to give my game away) I place the apple on the floor and roll it gently away from me.

Tath is seriously freaking out right now. It's started squeathing and beating its hooves on the ground. Can't make its mind up about whether to get the apple and risk the fall or stay safe and let its beloved apple tumble off the cliffs edge.

The apple bends towards the edge and with a terrified squeal Tath charges at it.

"AHA A WEAK MINDED BEAST LIKE YOU COULD NEVER BATTLE AGAINST ME IN A GAME OF WITS" I grab my sword in both hands and swing it towards the apple laughing gleefully at my victory

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My sword crashes onto the ground causing the apple to bounce off the edge but Tath is nowhere to be seen.

A sharp pain in my side and an odd lack of…ground.

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"YOU SON OF A-BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH"

Letting my sword fall by itself I claw the mountain side with my bare hands watching my hp drain and my fingers moving into the mountain side becoming a lot less like fingers in the process.

Thankfully I grabbed on pretty early so my momentum wasn't much. However now I'm stuck, fingers looking like they've gone through a blender and I have a good couple of metres to climb.

I've never been a very athletic guy (I could run but that was just in case of a natural disaster or zombie apocalypse (with all the human enhancement experiments biologists do nowadays I wouldn't be that surprised at an outbreak) and I prefer to have slaves do all the hard work for me (A dream, great and fanciful but just a dream. Maybe I could buy some Npc's? Hmm that's something to consider at a later date).

OK time to start climbing and hopefully not fall. I move my left hand up wincing in the process. I think I've broken every finger in my hand, possibly both hands. Trying to ignore the dull pain I lift my right hand in the sky and bring my menu up. Grabbing the daggers from my inventory I slam one into the cliff face while biting on the other.

Ripping out the other hand from the mountain side (I can't feel it anymore so any damage I deal to my hands now are just game damage) I slam the other dagger in.

Now slightly more secure (hanging at the edge of a cliff is not exactly a secure place to begin with) I step upwards with my daggers inches at a time. I have to say if this were real life I would be totally screwed (although if this were real life I wouldn't have been pushed off the cliff by a freaking boar and not any boar but my pet.).

"I GOTTA SAY WHAT KIND OF MESSED UP SYSTEM ALLOWS PETS TO ALMOST KILL THEIR OWNERS!" That's one messed up system but then again this is one messed up game. Maybe it's because I let the apple drop off the edge of the cliff? Actually that sounds pretty logical considering everything. Jesus I almost died for an apple.

I guess I need to add that to ways of getting killed by apples.

Finally getting a dagger on the plateau I pull myself up and roll onto safety (once again the mild irony). Tath comes up to me and gives me a nudge (I think it is a sorry?) almost pushing me off the edge again.

"Next time I go down, you're coming with me O pet of mine"

I crawl away from the edge and stand up. Sadly my sword (at least it was only an iron one) took a tumble down the cliff…So I have to take another from my inventory. I am really glad that I splashed out and got about a dozen swords because right now I have 4 left. 4 swords, my god this sucks. Aaargh this mountain's going to cost me more than it's worth.

*Bleat*

"Oh cmon"

I whirl around feeling my sword press into me taking the brunt of the charge. Crashing down on the floor I screw standing up and set up a _Thrust _pointed towards the goat.

The goat charges me uncaring of my glowing sword (I do love game systems sometimes) and impaling itself. (But sometimes I absolutely hate game systems) The goat bleats angrily as my sword tip sticks out its back and the goat slowly pushes through losing hp due to DOT (damage over time).

At least it's lost all its speed but its teeth look nasty. Its snapping teeth inch closer and closer giving a most horrific view (at least there's no spittle so it's just visual).

However the DOT is too much for it and its bar disappears causing it to burst and leave my sword hanging in the air for a sec before the weight is put onto my hands.

"Thanks for the help Tath" I look over at the boar who just gives me an 'oops' look.

Anyways let's get going, before it respawns again. My fingers have repaired themselves by now (it was really scary at first when I first broke them; I thought I was going to have to fight with broken fingers for the rest of my life. However being in a virtual world sometimes is not a bad thing as I apparently regenerate. I can break my bones all I want and I'll be just fine a couple of minutes after…) so I start climbing, sword strapped to back.

The climbing itself isn't that bad (considering that it is a cliff face and all) as there are nice holds of many kinds which kind of makes me think that someone made it very possible to climb.

I thought that the designers had done something helpful but that was quickly righted (or wronged) with the addition of wasps.

That is pure evil. Literally the last thing I want to do is try to fight wasps while climbing. That's bad enough but I only have two-handed swords so I have to stand precariously on a small ledge and swing my heavy sword.

At least they don't do a lot of damage. That's my saving grace.

Another saving grace is Tath who in a normal situation would have to travel the long way thus aggroing every monster in its path. However no monsters spawn by Tath and there are no other people to spawn monsters so I don't have to face a horde of monsters at each plateau; that would suck indeed.

Back to task on hand.

The climbing is going as good as usual with only the minor slip here and there and the growing numb sensation in my hands (I have gotten a lot of practice at it in the past few days).

No damn wasps yet, this is looking to be a lucky climb. But it does seem to be quite a long one, jeesh a whole 10 minutes dragging myself up already and I'm still not to the next plateau. This is going to be a long climb.

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*Bzzzz*

"Oh c'mon" The wasps are here, though seems like only 1 so far, that's good.

I quickly find a good hold and place my feet flat on the wall ready to spring.

The wasps buzzing gets louder and I glance back to see it heading straight for me with its sting. Now I know wasps and have been stung by them before IRL but my god these wasps are some junked up monsters; they're not the tiny little wasps just a bit bigger than a bee. No, these lot are giant ass wasps, giant literally as big as me wasps with stingers the size of my arm!

Blasting my feet off as soon as the wasp's sting gets too close for comfort, I swing them past the wasp and close them on its buzzing wings (wing? Yes I'm sure people call it that).

IGNORE THE PAIN IGNORE IT MARV

Letting my feet separate the wings slowly glide down taken by the wind. The wasp however stays beside me.

I HATE THOSE STINGERS

*BZZBZBZBZBZ*

Bringing my feet back to the wall the wasp sits beneath me and with no wings to keep it up it slowly slips out of me and drops downwards buzzing franticly.

"Oh Marv, you really have to make a better tactic, this one hurts. A lot."

I take deep breaths focusing on that and not the gaping hole that used to be my behind (thank god for regeneration). It'll be just fine in a few minutes, just a few minutes.

A soft echoed thud comes from below. Aaah I can feel the xp.

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After a minute of resting I start moving, really really carefully. If I don't move that much it won't feel that bizarre, as I am missing a few vital parts. I never thought I would ever experience such a thing but halleluiah that it's only in a game (though it's happened 6 times now, ooh shivers down my spine just thinking about it).

I should really go quicker to get out of here before the respawn. Oh I hate this game sometimes.

Speeding up with the most bizarre feeling in the lower region of my body, I reach the summit of the cliff within the next 5 minutes.

Dragging my head above the cliff I peek about checking out what's around; The summit is a plateau with a slightly angled downward path on the opposite side from where I am (so guess that's the normal path up then). Apart from that, the place is bare, ah except for a piece of bread punctured with a wooden handled knife suspiciously placed in the center.

Oh this doesn't look like a trap in the least; Dangerous cliffside with a narrow path down and bait. It gets on my nerves this trap because the bait is going to work, dammit.

Pulling my body onto the plateau I take out my sword. My body parts have reformed (which is most comforting to say the least) and I seem to be all in working order.

Creeping towards the piece of bread I glance round seeing…nothing. Then crouching down I inspect the bread further.

Head to the ground to see whether a plate lies underneath…no. I guess I'm just going to have to go for it then. I place my sword on the ground beside me just in case.

Deep breath in…deep breath out…deep breath in-

Gripping the bread with one hand I rip out the knife with the other dropping the bread's durability down to zero thus causing it to shatter into polygons.

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"Phew seems like I got luck-" The world seems to have gone sideways and just as I register that the pain on the side of my head comes and the floor smashes into the other half of my face. Without thinking I wrench my body to the side and feel the ground shake behind me accompanied with a howl, of a monkey?

Scrambling to my feet I see a large silver-haired gorilla beating its chest and howling at me, showing off its quite large fangs. My god those look nasty. Glancing back I see I'm stood quite close to the cliff edge, way to close for comfort. Peering up at my Hp I see it to be at around 30%. IT DID AROUND 70% IN ONE HIT (critical but still) JESUS!

So options; fight and die or run and possibly make it, though can monkeys climb mountainsides? (Ok stupid question they will obviously be able to knowing my luck). Or do I have a better chance trying to run past it and possibly into hordes of monsters below.

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Hmm what to OH SH-Flinging myself to the side I feel the air being pummeled above me as the ape's fist flies through. Bounding up to my feet I throw myself back to the ground dodging a backhand. Spotting a shadow to my left I stab at it with my knife and sink it deep into a foot.

Howling furiously the monkey jumps back giving my some breathing space but rips the knife from my grasp. It's mildly horrific that it stands on the knife embedding it deeper but making it so that it doesn't obstruct its foot. Well with the rate that his bar is going down (literally like zilch) The DOT is not going to amount to much soon.

Standing up once more I feel the air blowing towards me and jerk back violently tripping on my feet (great just great, exactly what I need).

I see the fist soar just above me as I smack into the ground (well only my lower half) and tumble off the cliff

"OH SHOMMPH" Whacking into the cliffside losing a few percent of hp I breathe a small sigh of relief. Thank god for finger strength. Hanging off the edge of the cliff I'm only there because of my fingers with are gripping with all their might the edge.

THUMP

Hmm, maybe I should drop down, it would be a good escape plan

THUMP

Ok I should really go down. But what if it climbs and I have to fight it on the edge of a cliff?

THUMP

Screw it 'KAWABUNGAAAAAHHHHHhhhh…?"

I had jumped and my world went round quickly bringing me slamming onto the ground skidding on my nose for a metre or two. Damn monkey grabbed me.

15% hp left, man that one took out almost half my remaining hp, however

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The ape stands there beating its chest and laughing? at me. But little does it know it stands on the edge of the cliff (ok I guess it's aware but still it knows nothing). The ape's hp bar has a visible tiny dent in it (so give the DOT an hour and I win, not bad considering) which is mildly relieving but I'm going to give it a really big one in a second.

Springing off the ground I charge towards the ape who was busy making its mocking towards me. My hands lock onto its and I push with all my might grunting, it grunts back accepting the challenge.

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I move an inch closer to the edge but lose that same ground the instant after. We stand there still as stone except for our battle-cries (mine are a bit poncy mind you but it's the spirit that counts) spewing over each other's faces (more literally on my side, eugh).

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Aaagh I'm not getting anywhere with the damn monkey and it doesn't look like it's tiring out. Ah why do I have to do such a thing?

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Slowly pulling myself closer the maw of the ape fills my view which is pretty horrifying, but the yellowing of the teeth is a nice detail. Ah damn it, not the time. I pull up right next to its face, literally inches away, (I would not dare to get closer, for at least with this range It can't swallow my head whole) then grin maniacally at it causing it to stop roaring and look at me in slight confusion.

"psst, hey, monkey, I've got something to tell you.

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"GOOD NIGHT MONKEY BOY!" Slamming my head onto its nose I hear it wince in pain…and stay in the same position.

"OWOWOWOW" OH MY GOD MY HEAD! OK NEVER HEAD-BUTT AN APE, EVER. It feels as though I've literally flattened my skull on it, Jesus what is that ape made out of, steel?

No point crying because I got to do it again, (also my hp dropped about 2% wow that's nasty) and again until it works.

Leaning my head back I scrunch my eyes to bear the pain here and the pain to come. Once again I whack the ape's nose and it flinches, slightly giving me a few inches of ground but not enough to push it off the edge, damn.

With no hands and no way to make my head hurt less I resign to just go on so as to not let the ape regain its ground.

Leaning back and then whack, OWOWOW. Lean back and…whack OWWWWW. Ok…its feet are literally on…the edge, only…one…more…to go. Lean back and wha-?

A shadow brushes between my legs and rockets into the ape's midsection. It oomphs and slowly falls back off the edge.

Ripping my hands out of the lock I just escape the deathly cling of the ape as it scrabbles the air to try grab on to something.

"Wahah, it seems I am victorious this time, oh monkey."

Something doesn't seem right however as I get the feeling I'm missing something. It's at the edge of my tongue…or the bottom OF HIS FOOT

Jumping forward aiming towards a wooden handle just slightly jutting out of one of the ape's feet. Fingers brushing past it finding no grip as it is embedded too deep. I watch it tumble out of view along with a screaming ape.

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"OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" I SPENT ALL THIS TIME CLIMBING ALL THE WAY UP TO GET THIS BLIMMING KNIFE AND NOW IT'S ALL THE WAY BACK DOWN, AAAARGH!"

Beating my fists on the ground I watch the edge to see in the vague hope of the knife magically appearing from below. But I have no such luck and I know it.

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Instead a window pops up giving me my measly 30xp whereas Tath got 470xp and a level up.

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All that work for that freaking boar to go and kill steal… I sit on the cliff edge looking melancholically out into the wild.

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"Good job Tath" I produce an apple form my inventory and feel the 'apples' wash over my mind.

I stretch out my hand sideways "Here you go" and drop it on the edge.

I feel the wind as Tath races towards it and in the corner of my eye I see the apple drop off the edge and watch it fall out of sight.

Completely devoid of any expression I turn towards Tath who is squeathing and rolling on the floor traumatized once again by the dropping of an apple off a cliff and look it in the eye.

"Oops"

Standing up I move past Tath (giving him a pat on the head on the way by, partially because I didn't get pushed off the ledge this time) and pick up my sword. I don't know what that ape's problem was, maybe if I had destroyed a banana it would be understandable but bread? Well logic is not exactly the truest thing here, especially not with the supposedly mad and bad game developers.

I turn back to Tath who looks absolutely traumatized.

"Hey how about we go down there to get them, does that sound good?"

Tath looks at me with expectation and I hear, the word apple fill my head (oh I do not know what'll happen when I run out of apples). I pat to my side and Tath bounds up to me and with a last check on my hp (it's about 60% which isn't too bad) we start down the path that is supposedly the normal way up (no way was I going to climb down; those wasps have had enough fun ruining my lower body for eternity).

* * *

><p>"AHA the exit!" Finally after literally 3 days, 3 whole days of walking down a mountain, we've arrived at ground floor.<p>

Man they really made the mountain trail super windy, not to mention the long string of monsters (mostly goats but there were a couple of easier apes and some wasps further up top) that we had to kill on the way down.

Jeesh a real waste of my week this has been. If that trail had only gone straight down it would've taken about half a day but nooo they just had to make it so that you basically go through half the mountain area.

At least I didn't have to climb bit by bit getting wasped up the rear every so often (So I'm glad in that area). Also the xp was pretty good (except for the fact that Tath did take the lion's share of it, another reason why we were so slow going).

Anyways must focus on the task at hand; to retrieve the knife, that damn knife.

Ok so the ape fell from about there so it would land…around there somewhere?

Moving alongside the mountain I check the walls to see if they have good holds (the cliff face that I climbed had some really obvious and nice holds, at the start at least. They got a bit meaner at the end but not too bad as I'm still alive). I do this for a good hour at least until I find a face that has quite an obvious route going up; the one that I took.

"OK. Tath lets start looking for the knife, you go ground I'll check the trees."

Climbing up the nearest tree I scour the branches from ground up to see if there is a knife embedded anywhere. It's quite possible the ape fell on a tree, seeing as though there's a forest right next to the mountain. Though, I shouldn't have to check too many trees.

A squeal from Tath brings me out of the branches and I head towards Tath.

I find Tath looking at a small wooden handle jutting out the grass. Oh yes finally a bit of good luck. I'm so happy right now, after literally 5 days of this blimming quest I've had enough of it but at least I have the knife. Halleluliagh.

Jumping around in joy (though it's more joy for not having to do the quest anymore than the finding of the knife) I do notice Tath has this melancholic look on its face as it stares down at the grass.

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I stop jumping and walk around a tree, bending down so my upper body is hidden but the lower is still in view, I take an apple out of my inventory and bash it on the ground a couple of times.

"Hey Tath, look what I found" Going back into its view I show the apple its durability lowered and looking a bit beaten up. Immediate burst of happiness and puppy eyes from Tath as it rolls on its back wiggling its legs in the air. Weird ass boar for sure.

"Guess we both found what we were looking for" I toss the apple over to Tath who devours it most passionately. A worthy sacrifice this time, cost me two but worthy still.

Walking over to Tath I pat it on the head and pick up the knife (well I kind of take bits of the ground with it; it was stuck pretty good).

"I think it's time we head back to the village (Ha can't believe I called it that, it really is not a village but logic isn't exactly this game's strong point) don't you?"


End file.
